Diego's Musings

The Tree of Death

2012-01-06T19:15:00.000-08:00

Was trying to conjure up an interesting title about the tree incident and the Terence Malick movie came to mine. That silly movie about evolution and a bratty kid in the 1950s. Okay, the movie wasn't really that bad, but it was a wee bit frustrating.Anyhow, I had previously written an entry about this incident but I had accidently deleted the whole thing with one swift keystroke. Then I was so annoyed that I just put it off till today.So a few days ago, I was standing there with Elaine, looking out our porch window at the trees at the preserved area next to our house. This preserved area has a swampy feel to it, with a wild growth of different scrubs, tree, and growth all over it. There's really nothing appealing about the area, but our concern was with a couple of bare trees that were tall and menacing. We were debating about its reach - whether or not if it fell, it would make any contact with the house.Later that night, I was in the office messing about with the computer when there was a snapping sound, following but a massive crash that sounded dense and dangerous. I ran downstairs and Elaine asked if I was alright, but I said it was an outside thing. We stepped outside and she was startled by the big log on our back porch. I looked at the fence but couldn't see any damage, and there didn't seem to be any damage to the house, so I couldn't quite figure it out.Turns out the tree had actually fallen against the neighbor's house, chipped off a portion of the roof, and then the top bit of the truck flew off, slammed against the side of our house and dented the down spout, and bruised the paint job a little. After helping the neighbor clear the debris from her driveway, I was out of breath, drenched, and a little in shock. It was a little strange all that stuff happened in such a short time, and we had to react so suddenly. This weekend I've got some hatchet shopping to do because a simple saw would just take too long to work through the truck. But yeah, it the span of three months, we've had two minor house issues, with the roof leaking and the murderous flying tree of death. Hopefully this next year we shall see nothing else.

Procrastinating

2012-01-02T15:00:00.000-08:00

Even though I don't technically get back to work until tomorrow, there's really some work that I should be doing right now in order to prep for work. But somehow, I'm still not doing it. Just clinging onto the last few hours of my winter break. It's some exploratory experiment I have to do for Sharepoint but I'm not versed enough to do exactly what I need to. I'll get around to it eventually. But yes, tomorrow it's back to work for me.Right now Alex has his friend Matthew over, and after a Nerf gun battle, they're settling down to play some Little Big Planet. They're just as raucous as ever, they are children that can be heard from a ways away. It's nice for Alex to find a friend especially since he's not quite on the same wavelength as the other children. I feel like that's okay, I've always been the same in that the rest of the kids are always so anxious to be grown up and hold different statuses while I've been the one who really wants to go at my own pace. Alex tends to stick closely to his pace and so far hasn't really noticed that nobody else is running alongside him.Being in this house really does make me happy - it's not about home ownership or some kind of status symbol, but just having this space and knowing that unless I don't pay my mortgage or something extraordinary happens, this is my space, and me and my family members give this home a soul. I honestly haven't taken too many photos of the kids in the house or the house itself, but I believe it's just a matter of me dropping the portable devices and spending some time doing that. Maybe right after this I'll go snap a few pics just to fill my 2012 quota of photos.After watching compliations of failed stunts and tricks on youtube with Elaine, there really is a fine line between bravery and stupidity, and the line is drawn very much in sand. I've done hours behind the video camera and perhaps I never churn out anything worthy of youtube or AFV is basically I'm usually pretty mellow. I don't jump off high places or sail off ramps to impress anyone. Some might call that boring, but I prefer to think of it as self-preservation. I prefer the absence of pain over the basking of glory.

2012.

2012-01-01T19:46:00.000-08:00

Unbelievable. Had half a page of crap written down about how I was going to start the new year by blogging more and trying to get some writing mojo going and I decide to sabotage myself by a sequence of keystrokes which deleted everything that I had written. Pure genius.Save.So as I was saying, there's one more day before I have to get back on the grind. It's a different kind of grind, not like the tedious, repetitive grind that I had been doing before, but rather a challenging one whereby I'm supposed to level up my experience and knowledge every day I'm there, proving to everyone that I'm supposed to be the guy they need. Yes, my job is like a RPG. It's work, and I'm not completely certain where I'll end up, but I keep plugging at it, striving for greatness.Save.So instead of retreading and telling about how Christmas went and how I spent the day taking down Christmas lights and reorganizing the garage, I'll just reflect about the year ahead.Other than possibly going to Disneyworld, I've really got nothing planned. Damnnit, they're watching AFV. I've got to go.

Playing Hooky

2011-11-11T12:28:00.001-08:00

Well, technically since I did put it a PTO request and I'm where I'm supposed to be, it's not really hooky. It's just and extra day off tacked onto the weekend so I can reclaim some of my own time.There has been momentous changes in my life, and it's been a little over a month since we've moved into our new home. We have more or less settled into a routine, and the house that we were trying to slowly fill with our dream furniture and furnishings is almost completely filled out because of our impulsiveness, impatience, and a little wiggle room in our checking account. In a couple weeks, we will fill this house with family for Thanksgiving, and I will be rocking the deep fried turkey for perhaps, the most awesome damn bird I've ever had the pleasure to cook. We also have friends visiting this weekend, so that will be fun for us.We also have been exploring our home improvement roots, taking on repainting Mom's house with a light orange coat of paint. We are not in the least careful, having spilled paint in various spots on the carpet that we have every intention of replacing, even before we had the notion that we could pretend to paint. That's going relatively well although it is going rather slowly. Either using too much caution or not being brave enough.November is shaping up to be a pretty exciting month - we should be getting our IXXI's next week hopefully, which is coming from the Netherlands, which I imagine have nordic looking printing out our photo cards and wondering why I consider my photography passable for any wall on any house. Also next month, I will be the owner of a Kindle Fire, which is like the poor man's iPad. Still though, it will be nice to have this tablet that I don't have to strain while reading, or suffer 3rd degree burns from like my laptop. And of course, Thanksgiving and the day after orgy, which is when I hope to acquire another television for our bedroom. Hopefully in the near future as well, I can get to revising and somehow producing one of my old screenplays. I glanced at it recently and it was a little rough. Somehow a 11 year old script will seem dated and awkward at whatever stage of life you read it at.Anyway, enjoying the new house, living the life. Stressed about work more than I've ever been but I guess it's got to give somewhere, right?

Getting Rid of the Landline Affordably.

2011-04-02T14:45:00.001-07:00

This is a work in progress, and certainly not the best possible way, but I think it should suffice.

So we're finally deciding to ditch the landline, and switching over to mobile phones. But because of budgetary contraints and since we generally don't use the cells enough to warrant a plan, I had to come up with a good method to keep everyone connected for as cheap as possible. This is what you'll need if you're interested.

1) A broadband connection with Wi-Fi

2) A Skype account

3) An Android phone

4) A google Voice account

Costwise, it'll be about $140 for the phone, $30+ for the Skype subscription (annual), and whatever you pay for your broadband. Naturally, if you don't already have broadband, or a computer, it's not very cost effective at all. But for my particular case (broadband and computer a necessity), the mobile solution got a lot easier.

So, to start things off, what I did was to purchase a prepaid phone with Android. You can actually get a refurbrished phone from T-mobile for 99 bucks, but I ended getting my wife and mom new T-mobile Comets for about 120 bucks. Because the phones work on Wi-Fi, I turned off the 3G and all my data goes to my phone via my home Wi-fi. I downloaded the Google voice and the Skype app.

I already had a Skype account with Unlimited Nationwide calling for about 30 bucks a year, it's basically a subscription that allows you to call anyone using Skype (computer or in this case, Android phone) to anyone in the US, landline or mobile. It's not a bad deal with the computer, an even better one with the Android.

Then, I got a google voice account with a local number. What Google voice does is a little hard to explain, but basically it's like smart voicemail. Say my number is 555-5555. If someone calls that number, GV will forward the call to any number of mobile phones, like me and my wife. If either of us answers it, it stops ringing. If nobody answers it, it goes to voicemail in GV and it can email you the message or you can access it on the computer. It also has a transciption thingy but it's rather buggy. So what that means is that to check your voicemail, you don't have to use your cell minutes, just use your broadband to check the messages.

So with all this setup, when I make a call at home or anywhere with Wi-Fi, I call the number, choose skype out, and I'm talking via Wi-Fi. No minutes used. When someone leaves a voicemail, I reject the call, it goes to google voice.

There are limitations because I can only use Skype to make calls via Wi-Fi. When I receive calls, it will cost me minutes so basically I have to be the one who calls. Also, Skype's a little buggy on the Android. It stays signed in, and then for some reason it gets stagnant and doesn't want to place calls a few times. You basically have to kill Skype before you make a call, which is a free app at the Android store.

This hasn't been fully implemented, but I'll be sure to update if it does/doesn't work out.

Facebook Statuses about Pearl Harbor

2011-03-12T11:37:00.001-08:00

Yesterday before heading out to McDonald's with the kids, I saw a Facebook status that was akin to it being "Karma" that Japanese people are dying because generations ago, the Japanese military bombed Pearl Harbor. And the status also noted that we shouldn't be collecting donations for the Japanese people because they didn't do anything for us. I had a very instant "WTF" response, and it pretty much tainted my whole evening because it was so amazingly ignorant and xenophobic in nature.

It's gotten a lot of blowback from the internet community since, showing up even on reddit, and I just have to get up on my soapbox for a minute here. I really shouldn't have to state why that avenue of thinking is dangerous and self-centered, not to mention incredibly stupid to boot. But I just have to say this:

You can be a patriotic American without being hateful towards another country or its people.

It's simple common sense but everytime I read about the religious protesting the right for a mosque to be built, or Indians being targeted because they looked like Muslims, or even that vapid comedian with his goddamn terrorist puppet - it drives me insane. They perpetuate the stereotype of the narrow-minded gun-toting American that the world is wary of. Shoot first, ask questions later.

In recent months, I've read about troops in the Middle East disobeying orders to shoot citizens protesting their governments, and these troops no doubt love their country and have swore to protect their homeland. But they have to know the difference between right, wrong, and being patriotic - and where that patriotism rests on the scale of ethics.

So if you read about one of these Facebook statuses, I think the best thing to do is to comment on their post, and tell them that you've donated some money in their name for the people of Japan. I think that's the most patriotic gesture you can show.

My ass is encased in a form-fitting cushion of awesome.

2011-03-10T22:02:00.001-08:00

The memory foam that we ordered from Amazon finally came today, and it was a little sketchy when I pulled it out of the box initially. It was so tightly folded up and bounded into a bale that it didn't look like much. Even as I was dismantling it, I had to peel off what seemed to be a half inch of foam that looked and smelt like dried animal hide. I had hoped that it was a good purchase, and wasn't so sure when I left to return to life.

But when I returned a few hours later, it had grown to it's natural state - the thin slab of stinky cheese slices was now a hefty, thick slab of form fitting heaven. I'm not quite sure how it'll play on my back, but here's to the hope that it'll fare better than my memory foam pillow. We had gotten those in the mail yesterday and although my wife claims to have had the best night of sleep in a long time, my experience was far from endearing. In fact, I kept waking up to find my head laying on what felt like a chunk of cold cut. My back was stiff and annoyed when I got out of bed this morning. But I'm going to give it a week, see if I adapt to the pillow or vice versa. If it doesn't pan out, I'll set the damn thing on fire. I guess it's a bit flammable from what I read.

I uttered something witty today, even though I'm sure even the person I was talking to probably didn't even hear me. But someone asked me if I was leaving too, and I replied that no, someone has to stick around to swab the decks of this sinking ship. Sigh. So many of my jokes never get realized because I don't have the same kind of audience as I used to have.

One of my major shortcomings is my constant feeling of regret. Nothing to do with my family or anything like that, I truly love them and secretly thank them for preventing me from becoming this train-wreck it could've been. But rather just the little things. Things that I've done that, in other people's perspective, may have been good, bad, or just fine - but I still feel bad one way or another about it. Probably one of my worst life decisions had to be that I went into wedding videography. I know there have been customers who have recommended me, who simply love what I've capture on their very special day, but I've also had customers who have either not given any feedback - which I feel is probably because they hated it but didn't say anything, or they straight out disliked my work.

I think the idea of ever being that responsible for someone's life event terrifies me now. I don't mind doing something like that as a friend casually, but if money was involved or I was the sole person capturing that event? No thanks. I even had a dream the other night about an idea for a short film, had it all ready to go - but the lead actress had a schedule conflict. I just don't want to deal with that anymore. I'm getting comfortable with the idea that I'm a better follower and contributer, and not so much a leader. I loathe the responsibility of being one. I often even wonder if I'm a good enough father - although in that analogy, it's probably good that I'm even questioning that notion.

Anyhow, that's something that I have to work on. Letting history be just that and not reliving it over and over again. I suppose writing things on a blog isn't necessarily the best path to living in the moment either. Hmm.

Migraines and change

2011-03-07T19:40:00.001-08:00

Really nothing that says good morning like waking up at four in the morning with a killer headache. Then I just got hyper-freaked about the time and tried to sleep despite the constant worry that I just wasn't going to get rid of the headache. When the ipod finally sounded, the headache was itself in full blast. So, utilizing one of the perks of the job and the fact that my manager is in Sweden, I emailed in that I was going to work from home after I slept the headache off.

So hours later, when I woke up feeling a bit confused, I ended up going into work anyway because there really is a ton of work to do and my job isn't the type of job whereby the work goes away you make it go away. So I went in, stayed really late, and now my schedule feels off again.

At any rate, I really needed to work today because our weekend was a giant spending spree, and amazingly a lot of it was done without even leaving the house. We got a memory mattress and pillows at Amazon, then got another Roku box because despite the PS3's streaming capabilities, it is more of an afterthought app that sometimes stutters at what it has to do. And I love that company anyway. I think we've bought 5 Rokus from them now. All the power to them. Then we went on another spree at Old Navy, because I really need more clothes than polo shirts and sweatshirts, so I got some dress up shirts and kids clothes. All and all, a grand damage to the checkbook.

High Strung

2011-02-24T22:15:00.000-08:00

It's ironic that I was once so bored with my job and I felt like I wasn't challenged enough. And above all that, I had no time to do anything at all. Because now I'm constantly thinking about work, worried about work, and dealing with constant deadlines that I have to constantly tell myself to relax and pace myself. It has gone the opposite direction and considering the circumstances, I am feeling much better about my job and where I stand in the world, although I don't feel like I have enough time to do everything that I need to do.

For a while when I was helping out at my current position, I would simply enjoy the longer days, playing a lot of video games, feeling much more relaxed. Now I play far less video games, mostly on weekends and not even that much. For some reason I'm gravitating toward watching shows more, its passive nature somehow seems a little more appealing to me. And perhaps, just being able to find the time and place to play my type of games can be difficult.

I've been thinking about video a lot, it really seems to be my medium of choice despite its inherent difficulty. It's easy to take a bad photo and make it interesting, but bad video is just bad video to me. My expectations for my HD camera have been borderline, recently hearing about people using their DSLRs to take classy looking videos have gotten my interest spiked, even though it is still lingering in the ball park of the prosumer cameras. I don't really have a great reason for getting a high end camera of any sorts, since I'm not actively pursuing any artistic endeavors. But nothing like nice looking video gets me feeling giddy. The Nikon D3100 has entered my field of vision, and it's a camera that retails for about the same as my D50 years ago. I don't really have any need to upgrade the still photography aspect of it, although having that bundled with HD video is something that I would love to be able to do. And with the lenses that I have? Sweetened the pot instantly.

I don't know, it's just to fulfill that gadget bug that constantly bites at me, I'm not even entirely sure how much shooting I would actually do when I do get a camera with video. Probably not much than I am now. For now I'll likely shelf the idea because of the moving in June, the possibly layoffs, and god knows what else.

It's really like a lie that I tell myself, that I'm ok doing what I do, when I really miss going around shooting movies and telling stories that nobody really watches. If only I had the gift of drawing, or animation, or having friends to make movies with me. Well, off to bed. Friday's around the corner.

Star Brite

2011-01-25T19:16:00.001-08:00

My brain is rotting.

Trickery

2011-01-24T19:01:00.001-08:00

Trickery

2011-01-23T17:30:00.001-08:00

Zoe

2011-01-23T15:44:00.003-08:00

Alex

2011-01-23T15:44:00.001-08:00

Solstice

2011-01-23T15:42:00.001-08:00

Daisy

2011-01-23T15:41:00.001-08:00

Dinner

2011-01-21T18:32:00.001-08:00

Spongebob's hair is growing!

2011-01-17T22:44:00.001-08:00

Untitled

2011-01-17T19:45:00.003-08:00

Untitled

2011-01-17T19:45:00.001-08:00

Alex

2011-01-17T19:33:00.003-08:00

Alex

2011-01-17T19:33:00.001-08:00

Zoe

2011-01-17T19:32:00.001-08:00

Zoe

2011-01-17T19:31:00.001-08:00

Office Boy

2011-01-16T15:12:00.001-08:00

Taken at IKEA

Chillaxing

2011-01-16T15:11:00.003-08:00

Taken at IKEA

Lamp at Ikea

2011-01-16T15:11:00.001-08:00

Taken at IKEA

Alex's Calendar

2011-01-09T18:54:00.001-08:00

I asked Alex about the picture he drew for his January calendar and he explained that it was Zoe and him on a sled, being pulled by Daddy, who is sweating lines. Mummy's face is red because sometimes she gets angry while walking the dogs.

Dirt, Nice to Meet You...

2011-01-09T18:04:00.001-08:00

I guess we must share the same birthday.

I've been feeling rather old lately, and I think children are to blame for that. They get all old and big and then I realize that they're no longer kids, and some of them even have jobs. That makes me feel old. It's a rather strange phenomenon, because some of these kids I see when I'm younger, and then for whatever reason I don't see them for years and that person disappears. For example, I've seen Derrek like three times in the past couple years, and I know he's 18 and taller than me in a tophat, but if the 6 or 7 year old version of him shows him requesting no onions in his food and wanting to play Nintendo 64, It would not be weird at all. Because 7 year old Derrek existed far longer in my memory than the 18 year old version. Same with some other kids, like Bobbie when I did her sister's wedding and she was the little girl running around, and now she's a teenager and everything. Recently a cousin of mine befriended me on Facebook, and I didn't really remember who he was until I asked my mother on the way back from the airport this morning. Turns out he was my third uncle's son, a kid that I used to play with whenever I visited Malaysia. I even remember specifically playing with mercury at his house. Or maybe that was a faulty memory from mercury poisoning, who knows.

But no, the kids are one thing, the other being that everyone is getting old. Movie stars I've seen are getting old. I'm falling apart myself, fragments at a time. All in all, I'm pretty ok with it mostly because everyone is aging too. Even you, right now as you read this post.

Dirt, have you met my friend?

Zoe

2011-01-09T13:44:00.005-08:00

Zoe2

2011-01-09T13:44:00.003-08:00

Stained glass clown at Value Village

2011-01-09T13:44:00.001-08:00

Interesting chicken at the Value Village

2011-01-09T13:42:00.003-08:00

$20 for this wonderful hand drawn portrait of someone's parents at Value Village

2011-01-09T13:42:00.001-08:00

A Dubious Milestone

2011-01-04T19:38:00.001-08:00

So today, at 34 years of age, I finally wrangled myself and my wife into a gym where I got onto a treadmill, for the first time in my life. For the first time I was running with no particular destination in mind, other than the fact that I was trying to get some form of exercise back into my life. I've been paying for the gym membership at my work for about a month and finally I dragged myself in there and get pretty close to convincing myself back out. But Elaine was with me and we both needed to just get into the gym and get back into some kind of healthy form. Even since I got myself a desk job, I've been doing even less exercise (although my previous job was more manual labor, not really exercise per se.)

It was a pretty good stride, occasionally breaking into some wimpy form of jogging whereby my arms flail about like some chicken with wing atrophy. I'm still not a big fan of the locker room, further reinforced today when a naked man out of the shower made some eye contact with me and smiled. It's not like I'm some complete homophobe, because it literally could some hot girl coming out of the shower naked, I would still feel completely uncomfortable. I guess nudity weirds me out to a certain extent. Or maybe I'm just a big fan of modesty.

Anyhow, other than extending my work hours a bit more, I think I'll enjoying this working out thing. Especially after Zoe looked at my tummy and said, "You must be really full." I hadn't eaten anything for hours. Sad, sad, middle aged tales.

Ribs for Dinner!

2011-01-04T18:31:00.003-08:00

Ribs for Dinner!

2011-01-04T18:31:00.001-08:00

Talking Death

2011-01-01T20:57:00.001-08:00

There was an unfortunate fire a few blocks from here, whereby a father and four children died in a New Year's morning fire, and it became a short topic this morning with the wife, and once again when we passed by the apartment complex where the Police and Fire Department were still on location, gathering their info and investigating the scene.

One thing I've never really shied from with the kids is telling them certain truths, and this case was really no different. I told them that the family got caught in a fire, and they died. I know some parents really wince at the idea of this kind of honesty, that perhaps I should maybe not tell them quite everything. A child's innocence is something to be valued, and should be shielded from the world's ugly truths as long as we can keep their world view candy coated.

Well, I can't really subscribe to that thinking completely, I guess there's a line somewhere in there that I like to fudge around. I try not to scare them too much of all the things that could happen to them, but I do enlighten them that if you don't watch the road, cars could hit and kill you. If you talk to strangers, that some of them can be bad people who might hurt them and take them away. That when Zoe sits on the banister on the top of the stairs, she could fall and break her spine and not be able to walk or could die. And in this case, that if we're not careful with fire, people could get killed. All that seems like a very harsh thing to tell 6 and 7 year old kids, but I feel like it's responsible for a parent to inform their children that these are truths of the world. If I'm going to let them watch children's programs where there are bad people or adversaries, I feel that it is important for them to know the major dangers around them at least. So

Incidentally, watching Max Fleischer's Superman cartoons right now. The animation holds up extremely well, there's quite a level of detail especially impressive with the facial expressions and such. There's quite a cinematic feel to the animation, although some of the stereotypes are painfully embedded into the cartoons. Lois Lane seriously toes that line between bravery and utter idiocy as she seemingly gets herself into trouble time and again. This version of Clark doesn't seem as goofy as the Reeve version, more of a boring straight man who happens to be Superman.

Anyhow. Back to Superman beating some Nazis disguised as African savages.

2010 in Review

2010-12-31T21:17:00.001-08:00

Really, this is for my own purposes since my memory seems to be getting shorter and shorter as the years progress. A year from now I'll hardly remember any details, like my photo organizing debacle earlier this month. Tried to organize all my photos by date and realized that between switching computers and platforms, all the EXIF data had been changed or lost. So now the baby pictures are all jumbled and I have absolutely no concept when they looked like what. I suppose it doesn't matter too much as long as the photos are intact.

Trying to recap the beginning part of the year is already a struggle for me... Well, I suppose we got to a very good start by visiting Bev and my cousin Jasmine during an impromptu visit to Portland. It was partially inspired by Dick Van Dyke, whom we were watching during one of the reruns on Netflix. He had a long weekend and wanted to take the family to Connecticut, and I thought to myself, we should be able to do something like that. So we picked Portland since CT was just a smidge too far to drive. It was a good visit, since we hadn't seen Bev for about 10 years or so and I hadn't seen Jasmine since she visited us a while back.

Then some stuff happened, and in March we went to Disneyland. It was also about 10 years since we went, back when Jael was just 11 or so, and it was the first time for the kids. It was pretty much the right age for them, except my children have a pretty unnatural fear of anything dark, fast, or loud. So we had to either wait or wince through a lot of the rides. All in all it was a pretty good trip, though it might be the last time I decide to drive to Anaheim. It's a long ways for one driver to cover.

I suppose the biggest thing about Summer was that we had a few guests, and some stayed more than a few days. Sam came over something in the summer, a product of a few bad decisions, and it was up in the air if he was going to stay - at least that's what the wife told me. I think she had it all mapped out, but just wanted to give me the illusion of choice, but after a few weeks, he was a keeper. This goofy, shaggy, timid little stinkball was going to be the new addition to the family. He's been good mostly for Daisy, keeping her busy by wrestling with her and allowing her to lick the inside of his maw for countless hours.

The other guests was Joseph and Jane, who came over for a couple weeks when their parents went off to Costa Rica. Handling four kids were not too bad, since those two are pretty good kids. They were a little unfamiliar with certain routines and were probably confused on all the hand holding we were involved in. But it was a good visit overall though the first day without them felt very, very empty.

Perhaps the biggest change this year is my work change. It's fairly significant since it's a drastic promotion, sort of like moving up from the mail room to the lobby or something. It also meant that I take on far more stress - since my job doesn't technically end when I come home from work. From that moment on, I was on the fast track to learn a lot of things in a very short amount of time. I had to earn my keep fairly quickly and though none of my peers really put that kind of pressure on me, my manager does and rightfully so. I have noticed a few more white hairs on that head and noticed that my dreams have gotten much more work oriented.

There is of course, a very bright side to that career change, the biggest thing being the more consistent hours that I do work. There is still "overtime", but it's more time that I can choose to work around. It a job that has more challenges and possibilities, and feels more like a career than a job that I just show up for. I still can't really shake the feeling like they could let me go anytime, but I suppose in today's economic climate, it's not an unfair thought to have.

In the last month though, I'm pretty sure the job has taken a toll on me. When I went in for my doctor's appointment, my blood pressure is noticeably higher, and the flu did hit me pretty hard. I think my immune system dropped when I was working overtime to get caught up.

Anyway, all that culminates to right now, when I'm just sitting here alone on the laptop, recapping the year while the kids are sleeping and the wife is working. 2011 looks to be another year of big changes, definitely a sweet vacation and moving in store for us.

Sam

2010-12-30T10:41:00.001-08:00

This is awesome!

2010-12-19T10:39:00.001-08:00

http://kotaku.com/5714995/shoot-up-any-web-page-asteroids-style

Zoe

2010-12-19T09:37:00.001-08:00

Snowflake Lane

2010-12-12T14:33:00.001-08:00

Download now or watch on posterous

p41.mov (11506 KB)

Untitled

2010-12-12T14:22:00.001-08:00

Test two

Posterior test

2010-12-12T14:18:00.001-08:00

Supposedly this will post on Flickr, Twitter, and my blog all at once. Funny thing is I saw "The Office" yesterday and they had a similar concept.

Great Dead Redemption

2010-10-17T22:17:00.001-07:00

Wasn't thinking about Red Dead Redemption much when I put it into the PS3, wasn't quite sure where the story was going since it took an unexpected turn, but after playing about an hour of it the game took yet another turn that got me quite by surprise. And when I thought that the game would be over by then, it once again kept going. Those writers at Rock Star really have something going. If they turned screenwriters they would do well for themselves, though one would believe they're making far more money with games then they ever would with movies.

Had a good day with the family today, just going down to the park and spending time with them made me think about how much I've missed them. In a way, my crankiness and impatience really just seems like a cloak that I pull over my eyes to cope with how little I see them and spend quality time with them. When I have an extended amount of time with my family, I do genuinely enjoy them, as they seem to do with me.

But another week appears, and we all have to contribute to our respective roles. I'm hoping in the new few weeks, I will be able to get positioned somewhere else in the company because I'm sick of the same old thing. I'm more or less ready for some change because currently I'm just an able body in an underrated job. I'm valued but not appreciated.

Anyhow, let me try out this new video thingie here.

YouTube Video

Issues

2010-10-08T17:50:00.000-07:00

One of my biggest challenges right now is probably homework with the kids. Never cared for it much myself, always a procrastinator when it came to my own assignments. Not that I wasn't expecting to do any with the kids at all, I just thought I would have a couple more years before the homework started flooding in. But no, Lake Washington school district coupled with Alex not finishing his work at school and having to finish it at home has made my evenings a little more stressful. I'm probably whining a bit about my part, but on work days I usually am just glad to come home, relax for 4 hours, and then go to bed. I suppose if Alex was more cooperative with school work it would help a lot. Arrrrggh I hate homework.

Today we just went to Walmart mostly just to pick up essentials, nothing in particular in mind. How we ended up with with a 450 dollar, 2 sided receipt blows my mind. And we didn't even purchase any big ticket items. I wouldn't be surprised if it was one of our biggest shopping bills ever.

Alright, this was a boring blog post. I'm done here.

Wake Up Call?

2010-09-09T04:47:00.000-07:00

The assembly was packed full of students, all seated on the floor waiting the a game to begin. There are white and blue uniforms in scattered groups, chattering noisily when the game then begins. Visible groans fill the air when a ping pong table is rolled out swiftly and unfolded - seems like it was not the expected event for the majority of students. The match begins oddly, not the high-tension serious match one would expect. The boy and the girl who are meant to be opponents to the death are goofing around. They are doing tricks with the ball, shooting it too far, making the ball do curves around the table - the sense of competition is absent from their match. They are simply goofing around, and I get agitated. In classic passive aggressive manner,I stand up along with some other kids and exclaim loudly to myself that the game is not watchable, and that they're just goofing off. Even though I had no concept to ping pong rules and regulations, that they're just bombing hard at it. I hear cries of protests that I can't leave, but I reassure them that I'm not, I'm just going back to the classroom to wait it out.

I wake up, and the things in the room are trying to line up from their trailing images. The magazines and books all over my room tell me that I'm vastly disorganized, and that I'm no longer in school, but back in my room. I can tell just from the books and magazines that I have various periodicals, comic books, and just clutter all about.

I wake up again, this time in a dark room. I'm almost sweating despite that it's rather cool in the room. It's 3:36 and then I realized that it was all just a dream in my head. Then this overwhelming sadness overcomes me because I realized I'm not in school anymore. In an odd manner, I really do miss school. I miss St. Andrew's in Singapore because it was just pure school - I was who I was, and I looked forward to everyday because there was soccer to be played, jokes to be told, personalities to be developed. I miss Hazen as well, though I had to be fiercely guarded, and being Chinese was suddenly a huge factor to who I was. Still, I had something to prove, there was the excitement of a new experience and yet a harrowing paranoia that I was going to be racially singled out by some jock. Still, there was a potential of new things coming my way. College was exciting as well, so many paths and options, and suddenly for the first time, I could decide which fork to venture down. Unfortunately, I was terminally insecure and indecisive, and after a couple years of blazing Journalism, I went the way of the Independent Filmmaker, proving that passion and responsibilities don't always mix. But it was still such a great culture - a place where people are together to learn, share, and there's a certain transitional feel about college.

I miss all those things so much. Not I'm working at a rather respectable place, though it is certainly not my first choice of ideal careers. It lacks the culture I seek, a place of creativity, learning, excitement, and the median age in my company is seriously in the range of 45. Everyone is self-absorbed and serious. As well as they should be. But I stick out like a sore thumb. I need to reconsider my life a bit and bring some of that excitement back into my life because right now it simply feels like I'm coloring by numbers. I need to write more, create more, and hopefully my day job will change to allow that more naturally. There is so much I feel like I'm missing out by just doing the bare minimum to go to work, pay my bills, be a good family man, and keeping myself distracted by popular media. I need to start molding, writing, creating, fabricating, and leaving some kind of legacy besides the memories I leave in people's minds. Something tangible that can be experienced by others. Otherwise there will be not cure for waking up at 3:36 in the morning in a sweat, then blogging about that jolt to the system.

Blogging on a nice day

2010-08-14T11:50:00.000-07:00

I know, on a ninety degree day like this, I'm supposed to take the kids out to a park, maybe to the playground or the beach, and have a nice family day. It's been a little drab the last few days, with overcast skies and slightly coolish weather. But I might very well stay at home today, after all, The Weather Channel itself had a severe weather warning about us Washingtonians keeping cool in air-conditioned rooms and taking in lots of fluids. I don't want to disobey warnings - it just wouldn't seem very responsible of me, would it?

No, instead I'm sitting here typing this blog entry on my PS3, using the wireless keyboard and seeing the words appear on a 40 inch TV. Because I bloody well can. I don't really feel up to snuff today. Wife's at work, and the kids seem content to be playing on the computer. It's their last couple weeks of summer anyway, and this is the closest I'll come to a vacation for a little while. Perhaps when I get a little bored later, I might wander out. But it's so hot out.

I'm starting to tire a little bit of Facebook. I think the biggest reason is perhaps I seem to be one of the few people who are aware that I'm broadcasting. I choose my thoughts semi-consciously whereas other people might rant, or spew, or fart out thoughts that are showing me sides of their personality that I really rather not know. That social networking stuff is a little tiring sometimes. I might want to know what you're doing once in a while, but for god's sake, I don't want to live with you. So I might keep posting via Twitter but otherwise keep my distance.

Well, I think I need a little Rock Band now. Yes, that sounds appropriate.

Sickly

2010-07-08T14:50:00.000-07:00

It comes off as pure coincidence when I get sick during the first nice two days of the summer but I can attest that I really am knocking on Heaven's... Lobby.

It started off with the sniffles and an inkling of a sore throat, but last night I was just burning up to 100 plus degrees. So I spent most of yesterday just confined to couches and chairs and being dog tired. Woke up feeling a lot better today, but feeling guilty that I missed work. As guilty as not making any money goes.

Got the paystub for my "bonus" though I have to argue that when a third of your bonus gets taxed out, it barely qualifies as a bonus. Federal taxes can bite me.

Thinking of getting on some writing schedule. It was significantly easier during my college years because my word processor was just that, didn't have Internet on it to spoil my quality time with my brain. And I didn't have so many distractions either. Now I find
myself constantly moving from room to room trying to find a quiet place to even contemplate.

Sitting out here in the shade but it's still hopelessly hot. The two kiddy pools are out and the kids and dog are having a ball splashing about in it. Daisy did manage to squeeze her way out of her leash and took off down the street but Elaine intercepted her while I did my best impression of a fat guy chasing down a phantom canine.

Having a couple days off have made me think about what I've got to do to get back in the game. Since I've never been one of those folks who do well in interviews, I've got to create some kind of environment whereby people come to me. I don't really know what that's going to work, but I'm sure going to spend some time thinking about it.

Whew, it's hot in here.

4th

2010-07-05T20:25:00.001-07:00

Not like we had it all planned out, but I suppose that one of the things we weren't really counting on was rain. But here it is, we are hanging out at the mall a little longer with no solid plans in sight when the mall closes. Do we sit out in the wet field in the rain? Or do we camp out in car for three solid hours? Either way, we should be amply entertained. That's one of the upside of having a geeky father. He's got an iPod with monopoly for him and the missus, a DS and a PSP for the youngins to kill some time. I come equipped with gadgets, I'm like the Batfather. And my wife is Robin.

Have been archiving video by tossing it on the computer, then upconverting it to 720p and making them into digital files, which is then backed up to Mozy so it lives in the cloud. I know this interests maybe one person, but it's a daunting but necessary task. Interesting thing is I came across a 4th of July tape from 1998 when my wife was just a friend and a couple kids were just a couple kids. It's interesting to view it all in perspective now, the adults have gotten fatter, the kid now has kids and the other is off to college. It's interesting how some mundane mindless videotaping takes 12 years to pay off in nostalgia.

Was tinkering around with the iPad and it is a fun little device, though I'm still not completely sold on it. There's still too many duplicated functions on my iPod touch, which has the added benefit of being a portable device with cheaper price points for apps. I suppose in the end a laptop might prove to be much more ideal for that type of money. Conclusion? Wouldn't mind one as a gift.

My writing schedule is crap right now, journalling is a mini effort toward the right direction. I've got ideas stewing and needs to be put down on paper.

So last week we got a bit of bonus and a pay bump, and though it's nothing to really write home about, it's certainly a good pacifier for me to cool down for a while. Still uncertain in the grand scheme of things, but I think I'll try keeping my eyes open for other possibilities.

The mall officially closed 16 minutes ago and there's still a good amount of people milling about, avoiding the rainy grass and whatnot. There are three hours left before the fireworks, and likely an hour after that just trying to get out of here. But I suppose that's what being a responsible parent is - taking your kids to see fireworks no matter what the weather is like.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Shiny Ass Example

2010-07-02T19:00:00.001-07:00

I think perhaps the biggest downfall to being a parent isn't the financial burden or the lack of free time - it's the fact that you have to be a Shiny Ass Example for them to follow. There's a load of people that comes to mind that don't observe this detail, and it doesn't seem to bother them - all the power to them. Unfortunately for me, it's a naggy thing that hangs over me. Am I setting a good example for my kids? Often not. If they based their personalities on me, they would be impatient, quick tempered, and sleepy all the time. Right now the current crisis is that Alex is obsessed with video games. I know I am, and I want more time to play them and love to lose hours to it, but Alex seems to want to take after that. I told him it wasn't a problem if it was part of his life, but he obsesses over them. When he's not playing them, he wants to read manuals and look at the box art. He'll keep looking at the clock for videogame time. He'll talk about what he wants to play hours before. It isn't healthy. I mean, I feel like I've chosen my path to be a gamer with no social life, but he needs to at least explore having a social life. There's a lot of things to see outside that 40 inch television set. So I have to be a Shiny Ass Example and refrain from videogames. Which sucks. I should "go to work" and go play videogames.

Anyway, wasn't really looking to buy anything in particular when we went shopping, but the price of DJ Hero jumped out at me. I think it originally retailed for 120 when it came out last holiday season, and for 40 bucks, it was the sweet spot I needed it to be. Even at 60 or 50 bucks I might have reconsidered, but 40 was a done deal. My impressions of it are rather positive, it's got fun music with a generous amount of hip-hop, R&B, rap, and some rock, and it's got lots of stuff going on to keep these fingers busy. So it's good.

Got a couple nuggets of financial windfall, with a returned check from the hospital and some pay merit and bonuses from work. Sweet. We're not really spending it aside from the DJ Hero, but that's fine for me. The only other thing that I really want this year is Rock Band 3. I'm narrow minded in that respect.

This business of archiving my videos is interesting to say the least. I've forgotten how much video I've taken and video is this strange perspective because it is exclusive to me - in that everything that was captured on video was at one time, what I viewed. So it's virtually a visual memory of 10 or so years ago replayed right in front of me. It's great because though the quality is slightly dated, it's still a very nostalgic thing for me to go through the footage. It's safe to say that I have hundreds of hours, what with the personal home videos, the movie projects, and the weddings. Though I haven't imported any of those other projects. Mostly because they had nothing really to do with me. In a personal way anyway.

Summer's been cool so far. At least not having to wear a sweatshirt is somewhat of a plus. I wonder if I really do miss the hot summers.

Watched 2012 with the wife yesterday and we was just a ball of nerves. I think she chipped off all her fingernails. I found it entertaining in a "end of the world" sort of way, although I wondered out loud yesterday if John Cusack has some kind of clause whereby he has to appear in a suit while in a movie. He's always in a black suit and a black tie. It's odd. Kept the Blu Ray another day just to review some of the tragedy. Hey, it's not like it's something you see everyday.

Out.

Day Off

2010-06-23T17:02:00.000-07:00

Didn't mean to take the day off today, but after a few hours of sleep I woke up with a stomachache and then the allergies just took over. Sneezing while you're lying down is a somewhat hazardous activity. Plus I just couldn't sleep. So I just got up and went downstairs, hoping to get tired enough or something. Ended up calling in sick because I knew I just couldn't make it till the end of the day. There was just no way.

Did end up taking a nap in the morning and woke up in somewhat of a daze, but we went out and did Tennis with the kids for the first time. They didn't do too bad, although Zoe didn't want to go for the ball much and overheated rather quickly, while Alex just wanted to play baseball. Trying to teach them that control was more important than hitting the ball hard, but I suppose they did pretty well regardless.

Boy, I hope the kids outside my backyard realize that they're tramping around in Daisy's bathroom.

Having a career crisis of sorts. The situation at my work ended up being nothing more than a typo, but essentially I got worked up because I was begging to get a title promotion, and they basically said there was no such thing. Then my co-worker goes to apply for the position and there it was. But like I said, it was a typo. I didn't have anything against my co-worker getting it, I was just sour that they didn't want to even admit that that position existed. In the end, much ado about nothing. The day got better though, when an engineering intern who was probably 19 or 20 came and had to study what I end and run some time trials on what I do. To top off the whole affair, this kid is from Western, which was my college. So it really felt like a bad joke from the Karma God, and I felt absolutely terrible about it.

Thing of it is, I really have to start doing what I love again. Even if it's not a paying position, even if only ten people see it. I have to do it again. It makes me happy. When I was in the shower yesterday, feeling sorry for myself, I reflected on the things that I've done. I've written 2 and a half feature length movies, a play, been published as part of a college curriculum, and taken a few honorable mentions at some festivals. It ain't much, and it all happened like eight years ago, but that felt so good. If I'm working on a movie and a tree falls on me, I wouldn't even mind someone saying that infamously cheesy sendoff, "At least he died doing what he loved. Because I do love doing that crap.

Been listening to podcasts as usual, nothing new there, but one of my new discoveries is the Kevin Pollak Chat Show, whereby this Comedian/Actor interviews assorted celebs. The surprising thing about most of these folks is the commonality of insecurity, self-doubt, and absolute blind ambition they have. The only thing difference perhaps between myself and them is that they were younger when they started, and they were in California. Well, most started elsewhere, but they pretty much ended up there or New York. Now I don't have to necessarily move there, since I do most of my own material anyway, but right now my biggest obstacles are time and money. Although it might be true that those two factors are obstacles for almost any scenario.

Anyhow, that is what is up right now. Stole this cool Arc wireless keyboard from my mom to type this blog and it's working out pretty good. Might tell her that I might borrow it permanently. Whatever gives me the illusion that it'll help my writing, huh?

Sporting a New Look

2010-06-11T12:30:00.000-07:00

Didn't really intend to spruce it up, just happened to see the little teaser so I redesigned the site with a few clicks. I don't think anyone will notice it anyway but it makes me happy.

Trying to get back into writing is tough, since I have to really decide between writing for the screen and writing a book. I'm far more experienced with writing scripts, but not much. Scripts don't necessarily sell either, whereas I can always self publish my book. I suppose in the end it doesn't matter much. As long as it gets me writing.

Rock Band 3 news came out today and it pretty much solved my unofficial resolution to learn some musical instrument. It encompasses so many things and a pro mode and even has some improvements to the hardware that I want to get my hands on. Perhaps the biggest deal is that all the previous songs work forward to the future installment. That's love from a company. Harmonix is truly a company that cares about its customers.

Anyway, that's about all I got. Got some bills to pay now.

Writer's Itch

2010-04-20T05:31:00.000-07:00

Been thinking a lot about writing lately, being my last resort at sanity, being my only lifeline to achieving the goals I want in life. My last grasp at not being average for the rest of my life. I think writing is like spending quality time with he kids. There's no tangible reward that's immediate, and I may never get published, but I think there's a satisfaction that fills in the gaps I have in my self-fulfillment canteen.

I've been thinking about making up lists on facebook, writing up novels, screenplays, but nothing yet. I think I just gotta get to it no matter what the scale may be.

Anyway.

10 Tips for Disneyland

2010-04-05T13:39:00.000-07:00

A lot of this might be common knowledge or tips I picked up from my co-worker, Mike, but it's still worth noting. In case anyone is curious.

1. Bring food. Although it is listed that no outside food is allowed in the park, the bag searchers have no problem with it. We mostly brought snacks and beverages, and even that saved us a lot of dough. Seriously, meals for a family of four of 2 adults, 2 kids without beverage is anywhere from 30-40 bucks. If you had to eat there like we did, skip on the sugary snack like Churros and Cotton Candy. They are expensive and do not fill you up.

2. Fast Pass Everything. It's not much of a secret, but a lot of people still don't know about it. Mike gave me a very helpful tip, which is Fast Passes do not expire if used on the same day. That saved a lot of trouble and you can even line them up after your time allows you to get an additional Fast Pass. I had 3 different rides lined up at one point. Do it whenever you get a chance, and you might have to walk back hours later to board the ride, but it's better than standing in line.

3. Set Time Limits. This only works if you have multiple days, but for the first four days we didn't line up for anything over half an hour. We would hit those either early or late in the day, when the lines were shorter. We hit the Nemo ride, which is usually a 50 minute wait, on our early admission day and it was far shorter. You'll save yourself a lot of grief.

4. Pins at City Hall. Unfortunately we didn't get ours till the last day, but it was nice for Cast Members to wish me "Happy Anniversary" when I was just passing by. By the way, we did celebrate our 7th wedding anniversary at Disneyland.

5. Souvenirs. This is relevant only when you have kids, but I decided on the first day to get a couple little things for the kids to tide them by, and the only other day to buy stuff was on the last day. So for the other three days, when they wanted stuff, we just said, "On the last day." That saved us a lot of begging. Also, we spent $40 and more on lunches and dinner so on the receipt was a coupon for 20% off the main store merchandise from 9am to noon, which we used on Friday. Saved us over 50 bucks that way. The other tip is that only buy things that you will use outside Disneyland. I saw so many people wearing Goofy hats and Mat Hatter hats that they will probably never use outside the park. Of course, this is a personal preference, but that's how I felt about it. I also only bought things that said "Disneyland".

6. Highjack people's memories. Haven't done this myself yet, but should work in theory. I didn't want to spent too much time snapping photos and stopping the whole family and missing out on the experiences, so most of my photos are meh. Also, I only had 2 hours on my Flip video, so I had to ration my video to just the kids' reactions and their participation, which meant I had to delete the parades and shows. Good part is that there are so many youtube videos and Flickr photos of the rides and shows that I'm just going to highjack them for my collection. There are way better photos and pretty good videos of the same experiences I had.

7. Single rider/Parent Swap/Handicap Access. The kids and wife don't like Indiana Jones? Well, I googled and indeed, the ride had single rider access so I got a pass, went in through the exit, and got on the ride in about 20 minutes compared to the 50 minutes for the line. I got stuck at the end of one family but it was awesome just getting to the front of the line.

8. Time Management. Sleep later. Wake up early or be ready to stay up late. Rest when you're waiting for a parade or a show to start, which is usually from a half hour to an hour for the major shows. Don't spend your day waiting in line. Look for a seat before eating. Eat off-schedule to avoid lines.

9. Supermarkets and McDonalds. Going back to the food thing, going to Supermarkets and picking up some muffins for breakfast or going to a late dinner at McDonald's saved us a lot of money. For the most part, we only ate one proper meal at Disneyland, and then dinner outside. Aside from saving a few bucks, you will also tire from rich D-land food fairly quickly if that's all you eat. The thing I was impressed with was that kid's meals were almost always complete, with some fruit and juice or milk alternative. The adults meals were shortchanged, but the kids got by fine.

10. Do your research. My big resource was Mike at work, but a lot of that information is also on a lot of Disneyland fan sites. I was surprised to how much I missed 10 years ago because I didn't do the research. Knowing more about opening times, parade times, and other info can save you a lot of time and maximize your vacation.

Disneyland 2010

2010-04-05T13:30:00.000-07:00

Day three and our legs feel like alien appendages. They're sore, stiff and generally dog tired from the foot travel. The one saving grace and likely deciding factor about the time of year we return is that the weather has been pretty mild. The warmest days and coolest nights have been in a nice comfort zone. I remember our summer a decade ago when it was so unbearably hot it made waiting for anything ten times worst.

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Seeing a lot of bad parenting here. People not minding manners, cutting or weaving just to get ahead, and last night there was a mom in line while the kids were elsewhere, then the kids just wiggled through swarms of people to cut in. The lines are structured so tightly that there isn't much room to do that anyway. On the flip side, there's a lot of good vacationers as well, people picking up dropped toys from strollers, some ladies letting our kids stand next to the curb after I unsuccessfully attempted to place a sixty pound boy on my shoulders. Most parents are empathetic.

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On the first morning, I saw my co-worker at the ferris wheel. I didn't know she was taking her vacation either and for as to run into each other in the midst of thousands of people is pretty cool. After an hour, we ran into each other again. I guess it is a small world after all.

C'mon you had to see it coming.

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One thing one really has to appreciate is the amount of detail in the park design, but for me I'm really impressed at how they do crowd control. Parking itself is a thing of beauty, all the spots are escorted so the line moves smoothly in one direction, no spot hunting or hoarding required. Then everyone gathers on the tram and we're taken to the park. Very well organized. They keep the lines and crowd moving and keep people well informed so that they can micro-manage their own schedules.

The parking enters in one spot and exits in another, so you don't have that confusion as you would in a mall parking of being disoriented. Also the escalators go directly to the floor you need for the most part, so you have to take four flights to get to your floor.

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When Heimlich, who is that German caterpillar from A Bug's Life gives riding instructions in his accent in Spanish, it amuses me.

Also, while I was pretending to eat the giant watermelon on the ride, the water that squirts on you does not taste like watermelon, just smells like it.

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Our diet of over expensive fast food is killing my appetite. I honestly am dying for some instant noodles or something. I an tired of outside food and paying thirty plus dollars to feed a family of four. Seriously in a single day without buying any gifts or souveniors it averages about a hundred bucks just on food and parking. And we even bring our own snacks and drinks.

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"Doinnng!"
"Ahhh!"
Soft sobbing.

That is Alex running into the spring stopper on the bathroom door, scaring himself, and then being upset about it.

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The Ramada Limited is living up to it's name, having one of our worst hotel experiences ever. Last night after we turned in early for the night, we woke up to idiotic guests who were loud, chattering at full volume, and some even rattled and tried to open our room doors. I was pissed. But sure, that's not necessarily the hotel's fault, but let me tell you what is.

The TV that was magnetized and now shows a discolored picture on the sides, the old microwave that reeks, the fridge that doesn't work, the room that is musty and old, the garbage outside that is too small, the towels stuck under air conditioners to stop the leaks, and the toilet plunger in the front yard. That's the hotel's fault. Aside from the location, there is absolutely no redeeming factor to stay here again.

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We've attempted to break them into rides with polarizing effect. They hate roller coasters, rides with big drops, dark or loud rides, or rides that seem ominous. They hated the Pirates of the Carribean, cringed through the kid coasters, but really enjoyed the kids rides. Alex started crying in anticipation of the Roger Rabbit ride, and we had to calm him down with Pocket God on my iPod. But afterward we went again right after with a fast pass. I was a little annoyed at first because I was sorta looking forward to the Indiana Jones ride and the Captain Eon show, as Elaine was for Splash Mountain, but that was all nixed. But I came to the resolution that all the kid rides they're on now will be unbearably boring to them when they're older, so it's just a matter of timing. They're be ready in a few years. When they retire the rides.

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Getting a lot of blogging done waiting to meet the princesses. I think we've been here for close to 40 minutes. I'm not even positive Zoe is all all psyched to meet them. She gets shy around them and just deadpans her excitment.

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Hahahaha. I'm in the single rider line at the Indiana Jones adventure. I just skipped about a fourty minute line. The wife and kids weren't too keen on this ride and rightfully so, so I have this opportunity to fill in an empty seat.

Finished the ride and I'm glad I went solo. The kids would've been miserable throughout and it is rather frightening. I had a big smile when I came off the ride though. Something nostalgic about it, you know, being a former adventurer and all.
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In these seemingly alien conditions, I think the true personalities of the kids really come out. Alex is game for anything and but struggles with complex instructions, but genuinely has a good time regarding audience participation. He is still a little shy, especially when approaching princesses and being asked by his annoying father to bow to the princesses. Zoe is extremely reserved, often not even cracking a smile and avoiding eye contact. She shifts around when someone is talking to her, but is generally compliant. She would rather not participate, and hides her emotions behind a look of indifference.

Alex hasn't shown much interest in meeting characters, and Zoe only mentions it in passing, even if she's eager to meet them. Both got pulled to join a street fair and they seemed uncomfortable and slightly miserable. But I'm sure they were having fun.

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The vacation was planned pretty well. Two days each for each park and now on the fifth day we're basically finishing up the rides we missed and repeating the ones we like. Zoe got her third Winnie the Pooh ride and it is precious because she's got this toothy smile on her face. I think Toy Story Mania and Buzz Lightyear is Alex's favorite, because of all the shooting. I admit they might be mine too. Ride plus videogame always equal win in my book.

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Driving back to Redding, CA as our overnight stop and we're only 150 miles in and I'm exhausted. Hopefully some coffee and Dennys will wake me up a little more. I did call in to request for Monday off so that I can rest after the vacation and two days of driving but so far, the kids will be going to school the following day. I kinda feel bad for that. I need the day off just to reorient myself back to normal life. Get geeked out again.

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Never drive to Disneyland from Washington. Unless you have three drivers. And any children you might were were suspended somehow. The drive there was so-so, but during the drive back we had rain throughout, some sun, and snow at Mt. Shasta. Heavy, sliding snow. Your back tends to get all cramped too.

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An interesting footnote to this trip is that Disneyland experienced a slight delay when the earthquake in Mexico rattled Disneyland. We were literally driving away from natural disaster, even though there was no damage or injuries in Disneyland.

Gasworks Park

2010-03-07T14:25:00.000-08:00

I like the rustic structures at the park.

Dragon dictation app

2010-02-09T17:48:00.000-08:00

I don't know if this is going to work or not but I'm going to give it a shot. I am trying this new app by dragon dictation for the iPod touch, and I have to enuciate my words more than I usually do. I am also saying the exclamation marks and punctuation marks in order to make sure that it's formatted correctly, otherwise I will have to go back and edit it manually.

Well, I guess that is working pretty well. I just had to go back and change a few words, and I suppose that's not too bad of a way to go.

So work has been going pretty well, despite the fact that I have to learn quite a few new things that rattle my brain quite a bit. My new job has to do with databases and queries and Microsoft Access, a lot of new concepts that I'm not familiar with. But over all, I think it's going quite well.

I'm getting quite psyched about Disneyland, especially after my coworker at work loaned me a Disney vacation planning DVD. There's really not so much new information on there, but it was the first time that my kids have seen anything about Disneyland. I think I'm the most excited about just taking some time off, and having some nice weather for change. Not that the weather in Washington has been so bad, since we had a pretty light winter.

One of the things I have been enjoying lately is the new This American Life App, that's put out by the WBEX. I enjoyed the weekly podcast quite a bit, although if you missed one of two weeks and it doesn't archive on the RSS feed. It only features the latest week's installment so this app allows me to access the archive for free basically, except it has to stream. This App also has a bunch of bonus episodes from the TV show that isn't readily available, so it's quite a bonus. If you never heard about this American life, be sure to check it out.

Well I suppose this app has to have some kind of threshold, because after a while it stops recording in order to keep the messages short. I suppose that in the grand scheme of things, It's not a bad thing.

I'm just a test that out right now and see if it records my conversation in the normal speed instead of having to talk a lot slower than I usually do.

I have a strong suspicion that my dog is actually a Brazilian Terrier, which is quite a departure from the previous assessment that it is a rat terrier. This is quite a revelation considering that we were never quite sure what breed Daisy really was.

I think this will be a good time to stop, since I'm not quite sure how much editing I will have to do with this entry. I did think about starting a podcast, maybe a voice podcasts for my blog entry. However, I don't think anyone would ever listen to it so it might be a complete waste my time. So I'm a try this for now , and see how it goes.

----—

I guess when I dictate my blogs, the stories seem more random than usual. Maybe I'll learn to relax more in time.

Hmm

2010-02-04T19:39:00.001-08:00

I wouldn't call it my new job per se, I'm simply working in a different position in the company but still paid the same. In a lot of ways, I'm like an intern of sorts that's training to know all these things but there's a chance that it's all for naught. But so far, it's been a steep learning curve comprising of new programs, new concepts, just new everything. On one hand, my old boss is loaning me out on a week by week basis, while meanwhile my new boss is having my own computer installed in my own cubicle. Weird. The biggest plus in this whole adventure is that the hours are awesome. No more 10 hours days of waking up at 4:30am and going to bed by 9:30pm, instead it's a 6:00am wakeup time and a almost 11pm bedtime, which makes me very happy. Granted I did lose my Fridays off, but I do feel more like a regular human being with normal operating hours. Instead of feeling like a human am/pm. It's difficult to say much about the job since nobody has really solidified any decisions, but it's a nice progression. I could get used to this. Another upside is that I get to see the kids in the morning, which is kinda nice even if I'm not terribly talkative at the table. It at least is an attempt in normalcy.

Well, the gauntlet is thrown and the plans are made and hotels are booked. We are going to Disneyland in the spring. After some frustration and
money crunching, I decided that flying wasn't really a great option since it would've bumped up the bottom line quite a bit. About a grand, actually. So we are driving to Anaheim, with a stopover at Redding, CA, whose only distinction is being the middle of our driving route. But we are taking it fairly easy, with four full days set aside for commuting and five full days at Disneyland. The last time we were there was when Jael was 12 or so, so it was about ten years ago. California Adventure was still under construction and not even open yet. We are looking forward to it all even if we are likely to skip many of the crazier rides.

This afternoon I was shown my cubicle and I got pretty pysched. I don't know how long I'll be there, but now I have my own computer, my own extension, and a voice mail which says my name. Special!

Well, gotta get up. Elaine is making me motionsick with her shaking on the couch.

Write On

2010-01-17T23:09:00.000-08:00

I haven't sat down and cranked out any script since college - talk about quitting at the prime of my young career. Ever since there has been some writing activity here and there, but nothing overly ambitous or noteworthy. Well, after discovering the Creative Screenwriting podcast with Jeff Goldsmith, I've kinda fallen in love with the idea of writing screenplays again. Listening to their process, struggles, and their journeys have inspired me to maybe start putting something back on paper. Or in this case, thumb some words into the iPod. I purchased a screenwriting app for the iPod and it syncs with Final Draft, so now I have no excuse to not do it. Just to find the time and the inspiration to commit something to a draft. I actually have a couple solid ideas, like a kidnapping drama and also a lighter comedy with loose thematic ties to the afterlife. There's also the matter or revamping Cells, a three act play I wrote in college but most likely not. Anyway, I'm prepping my brain to take on screenwriting, so that may very well be my half assed new years resolution.

Also been catching up with movies, having just finished Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince last night. I have to say, I'm a semi casual fan of the series, but having watched the first film with the kids and then the latest one puts things into perspective. Seeing how a lot of the story links up, the characters grow up, and how one film ties in with the other is pretty amazing. I was even seeing things in the first film that foreshadows the later ones. That Rowling is a pretty smart one. I wouldn't venture so far as to reading the books per se, since I'm a illterate monkey with a short attention span.

Been working a whole bunch lately, but not even as much as my coworkers. I clocked in about 23 hours overtime last week but I believe my coworkers came closer to thirty. This coming week though, I might get quite a bit. That said, it's bedtime for me.

Travelogue

2010-01-07T19:33:00.000-08:00

People pack their best when they're on vacation, and for some reason I decided that Oregon should see me as a human potato. Or a really confused Desert Storm deserter. I was rocking the beige top and pants. No one really commented on it, I just caught a reflection and was instantly appalled. Then I danced around like a hot potato for effect.

---

Travelling with a dog is somewhat challenging, especially when the hotel doesn't allow you to crate the dog by itself. She spent most of the vacation in the car, so I felt a little bad for her, but at least she got to see Oregon. Wilbur is crazy jealous, from what I gathered from his expressionless face. Daisy spent all the commuting times on Elaine's lap, kneading her thighs and shedding all over my poor wife. If she had any more fur on her, PETA would've picketed my wife. Daisy also got herself riled up over other dogs, cats, and bold red Oregon squirrels, and decided to take it out on her leash. Her retractable fifteen dollar leash. Damn dog.

---

We never visit friends and relatives in other states because we usually don't have any, but in this rare case we had an opportunity to visit Bev, who is my wife's ex mother in law. It's not as awkward as it sounds, since she's a pretty nice lady. Easy to chat with, very warm, very grandmotherly even though my kids have no blood relation to her at all. I'm glad we got to see her, even if it meant an hour of driving through hellish, rainy traffic.

I also got to see my cousin in Oregon, and meet her husband Patrick. I haven't seen her since Alex was less than a year, so yeah, it's been a while. We had dim sum and I ordered like a maniac with the full intention of picking up the bill, so when they did I felt a little bad because their palate was on par with Elaine's, which is to say they were willing to try new things, but they usually stuck with what they liked. I wished to spend more time with them since it's not often I get to spend time with peers who are related to me, but they had jobs and we had a timeline to adhere to in order to get home in time for kids bedtime. But still, it was a good visit.

---

A milestone I hoped to never reach was realized when I innocently went to the bathroom at the motel. What was to be a routine drop slowly unravelled into a horror show when my deposit failed to swirl into obilvion, instead swirling upward in a rising pool of unusual undigested byproduct. In a panick, I started bailing filth into the bathtub with Daisy's dog dish but it kept overflowing, because the stopper in the toilet bowl was also not working. I reached for the valve to shut off the water but instead cranked up the pressure, flooding the bathroom floor with some really bad soup. Finally I shut it off, and yelled for my wife to get a plunger from the front desk. The manager, who did not seem to understand that I had a reputation to uphold, sent in a housekeeper.

I avoided eye contact as she undoubtedly was emotionally scarred by cleaning up after me. We left the room promptly soon after with a tip to cover the cost of hand sanitizer.

---

The ironic thing about Science Centers are that the kids love to tinker with the physical props and ignore the actual Science. They don't care what propelled the empty soda bottle, they just want to make it go. Meanwhile, I'm trying to learn something I should already know, but because of the kids and their desire to hope from exhibit to exhibit, I find it easier to just ignore the words and play with the toys.

Perhaps the most eye catching exhibit aside of the giant submarine docked outside te Science Center is the pre-natal section, basically about childbirth and all that. In the middle of the floor is a section with an almost full circle enclosure which is black. And at eye level, there are glass displays of fetuses from early conception all the way to near full term. Surprising to me at least, was that all the fetuses, maybe thirty or more, were actual fetuses.

I suppose some people might raise a fuss about it, but i think I was rather glad that it exists. It's not like it caters to any morbid curiousity, it was done rather well.

---

The highlight of the Oregon zoo had to be one of these three things: The Zoolights, seeing the Bat exhibit, or watching a monkey pick anothers' posterior, insert residue in his mouth, and then spit it out. That was a lesson for many of us that day. The baby elephant was pretty cute too.

---

It was a claim that didn't seem true, more so when we were seeing it in person. The second tallest waterfall in the US. Didn't seem that tall. Reexamining the photo I took, it was actually the second tallest continuously running waterfall in the US. Tricky.

We tried hiking to the top of the waterfall, but it was quite a trek. Pretty cool though, even if I'm usually not the kind to enjoy nature much.

---

Irony is when your windshield wipers don't work and it's pouring down rain, and when you finally switch the left and right wipers, it stops raining for the rest of the vacation. The first Two days were like trying to wipe down windows during a downpour with a wet towel. I depended mostly on large shapes to drive.

---

When a large man approaches you at a gas stop in Oregon, he's not trying to rob you I found out. To cover my embarassment, I went inside and tried to pay for a full tank. That's when the attendant told me that he had to fill the tank first. I'm so cool.

---

It was a much needed trip really, it should hold till Disneyland in the spring.

Post Xmas Fatigue

2009-12-28T18:11:00.000-08:00

Yes, there is such a thing because I have it. After all the spending and visiting, I'm eager to get back to my boring ass life. The one filled with chilling out and being a complete dullard suits me just fine. I don't know, Christmas hath crossed the treshold from being a joyous holiday to being a chore of tolerance and wallet gutting. I enjoy spending my money on some people more than others - I guess that's a good way of putting that. Grinchy as it may be, I am happy that Christmas is one whole year ahead. Gives me more time to avoid it. Funny though, since my wife really enjoyed it this year round.

My glasses decided to self destruct last night, snapping on the top of the rim again. This is the third and final snap, having been welded back into place by a shop the last two times. Yes, the whole "spectacle" probably cost me about five hundred bucks, between the initial cost of the glasses and the two weld jobs. So I'm certainly sticking with contact lenses.

Because of some misinformation, I ended up keeping Metal Gear Solid for the PS3 and with a gift card and a sale, also ended up picking Ninja Gaiden and Fallout 3, which I gave up after renting it because it was becoming too much work. We will see if this time I develop more of a fondness for it. Anyway, all those should be keeping me busy for quite some time.

Well, I'm literally falling asleep in the midst of the kids bickering and yelling over Little Big Planet. Stopping here.

Waiting for Brown

2009-12-15T17:48:00.001-08:00

As I wait for the UPS truck to arrive, I'm realizing that I haven't blogged in a while. And despite my total lack of interesting tidbits to share, I'm going to write anyway. Because I owe it to you.

Anyway, I am waiting for Hdmi cables, component cables and a HD indoor antenna to arrive from Monoprice.com. I've heard about them strictly from podcasts but they have been known chiefly for good prices and decent quality. Which pretty much sums me up, I'm decent quality. Nothing really impressive that will knock your pants off, but likely someone you wouldn't mind pointing to and refering to as "my acquaintance".

Work has been a little interesting lately, I've been requested and also assigned to help in other parts of the company, and it's been interesting. It's a mix between gratitude that I'm doing something different and slight boredom. Mostly because I'm taught enough to color by numbers, but not really knowing what picture I'm coloring or why I'm choosing those colors.

Bad analogies aside, I actually had to tell one side that I had a previous commitment with the other, and they could have me for half the day. The punchline to all of this, of course, is that I don't know what I'm doing. I'm way underqualified for the new position, but they're doing a grand thing and taking the time to explain everything to me. I wasn't offended that he mentioned that it would be two weeks before I could do anything productive - rather I saw that as a good thing. But we'll see how that goes.

I haven't had much time to enjoy the new tv, although it is noticeably more awesome than the last. Widescreen is my friend. Gaming on it is a ton of fun, though playing Burnout on it close to blew my brain apart. High speed and big screen equals mind blown. And hooking up my meager computer speakers to it just enhances the squishiness of mass chaos while playing Prototype.

Was slogging through the damp grass when I realized that this was Daisy's first winter. She was born in April, so she's still a puppy by definition.

Ok, I'm yawning from all this blogging. I'm out.

Cloudy and cold

2009-12-04T14:27:00.001-08:00

There isn't anything terribly important to note, just spending my day off listening to intermittent Christmas songs that plays between my regular songs on the iPod. We are watching our budget so staying home seems to be a pretty good solution, although it does drive Elaine up the wall. It doesn't bother me quite as much, because from Mon to Fri all I ever do is to work, and then linger with exhaustion until bedtime so I could do it all over again. Elaine took Zoe to World Market to window shop a bit, and I'm just hanging out at home with the boy. While he's playing Legos, I'm on the iPod tapping out a blog entry.

November came and went, and now it's weeks before Christmas and it's hard to fanthom. We are maybe seventy percent complete on our shopping, and for me only one more paycheck to go. Elaine and I are both exempt from gifts, since we both got our gifts early with the TV and the couch. We are cutting down on kids presents this year, being how their toys have such a short life cycle, we decided to instead save that money for a trip to Disneyland instead. Of course, none of that money is there anymore, but I suppose sometime in March or April we will go.

It is a little tough to think of myself as a college graduate, and everyday I go to work I get reminded of that everyday. I have to swallow chunks of my pride everyday, when people with less schooling running the show. I dunno, I'm having this mid-life crisis whereby I don't know what I want in life anymore. My ambitions got smaller and now it seems that my short term goal is to make it to the weekend, and my long term goal is to look forward to the next holiday. My imagination is stifled by stress, fatigue, and constant refereeing. In a lot of ways, I am content with the life I have, with a wife who loves me and sticks by me, two good kids, and a pretty good dog whose worse moments comes when she's bored. Hey, if I could chew on walls, there's no guarantee I wouldn't do it either. But in a lot of ways, I'm sad as well. I don't know what I'm contributing to my legacy. Even my wit and smartassery isn't documented, so it's not even like I could coast off that. I don't write anymore because I'm making excuses, and indepent filmmaking slips further from me. My equipment is old and falling apart, and my willingness to work with actors was lessened with the last project. I just don't know what I'm doing most of the time.

McD reflections

2009-11-12T19:57:00.001-08:00

Making it through this week is a bit of an accomplishment, since there's still a fair amount of modeling clay in my respiratory system. Sometimes I would exercise my child like fascination, looking at my expectorate and marvelling at its structural integrity, wondering to myself how something like that managed to come out of me. I've also been avoiding speaking in general, everytime I try to utter something resembling a sentence, my throat would itch and I'd end up coughing. I imagine most people do not find coughing appealing, especially since the flu scare has probably got everyone ingesting Purell just to keep themselves sterilized. So I just figured I wouldn't talk much, so that I couldn't cough. Somehow being anti-social sat better with me than being diseased.

So my National Novel Writing Month has bombed so far, kicking off with a week long flu and then just wallowing in general fatigue. I've been going to bed so early this week that I've qualified myself for dreams again. Usually my brain doesn't get to go into REM state, it just naps before it snaps to conciousness again like an angry bulldog, looking for something to do for the whole day.

After some thought today, I'm thinking of switching my novel to a play format, because I've been having a little trouble making my book effortlessly funny. Also, I think it'll work slightly better as a play anyway, since novel writing isn't my strength. We shall see, since we are talking about rewriting a whole two pages or something. Bah. What a terrible writing schedule. I used to write so easily and now it's a chore and an experiment on my ability to doubt myself.

Have a few hours of work tomorrow, going to a training class that someone enrolled me into. Not quite sure who decided that I should take a class called "Value stream mapping", even joked to my supe that maybe they needed a gnome to fetch coffee so they decided to sign me up. But glasses have to be half full for me, I have to look at it as an opportunity of sorts. I'm sure having taken this class is sure to bump me up somehow.

Been listening to the Creative Screenwriting podcast and it's just amazing. Listening to their work process and knowing that it's a lot of writing and rewriting, a lot of patience, and a while lotta luck that gets people where they are. But it's just work. Breaking down the story to see what works and what doesn't, and tearing away scenes that you love because they simply don't serve the story. Probably the best ones so far are from the writers of Watchmen and Walle. These guys have spent years and years, rewriting and writing. It's just humbling to know that they have to work as hard as anyone else to make the story work.

Well, fatigue and the antics of the McDonalds playground are distracting me, so that's it for me. I've counted five kids crying so far. It's like a brutal gladiatorial ring of sticky-fingered midgets trying to trounce each other.

Weak week

2009-11-06T13:45:00.000-08:00

Well, last week was a complete travesty. Between high fever, bad headaches that would conjure up nightmares of brain damage and dark places of my soul, and my insides feeling ravaged and destroyed, I think I'm finally getting better. Went back to work on Wednesday thinking that, but when I woke up Thursday morning feeling like I was sledgehammered in the head, I called in and had to lose a day's pay. Such is the consequences of being stricken with the flu. I don't know if I wanna be all dramatic and call it H1N1, but I've never been so sick for so long. Usually it's a three day affair the most. It wouldn't surprise me though, if I did get H1N1, since this strain of flu had floored me so badly.

Other than the lost hours of work, I also lost about a week to write, which really sucks. I couldn't concentrate long enough to write, couldn't even look at the screen for long. And now that I know I'm behind, the incentive is even less to keep up with their schedule. But I'll get back onto it. Just have to keep my own schedule.

There's also a constant hunger I have in my stomach, this weird feeling that I'm hungry although I'm pretty sure I'm not. I can taste any food right now anyway, my palate has been reduced to very basic sensations, like salty, sweet, and poop.

And I used to be so witty.

Firsts!

2009-11-01T19:50:00.000-08:00

Today was the first for many things, although it isn't as exciting as it sounds. It was mostly comical and sad, if anything.

The first day of my illness marked the day, after bein surrounded by sick kids and sick wife, it was plainly inevitable. I haven't quite had it bad, just an irritable throat that makes me cough here and there. Not like my wife, who's bound to cough up a major lung sometime soon. But I fear the impending misery that comes with the illness. Still not sure if I'm still going to work, but most likely I will. It's the only way I can get better it feels like.

The second first is the the first day of National Novel Writing Month. I have to report that I'm really nowhere close to the minimum amount of output, mostly because it's so damn hard to find a quiet moment to myself, and after having found it, to not indulge in the awesomeness that is Uncharted 2. That game is quite fun, although I've spoilt a bit of it from watching way too many reviews. I've got the beginning of the story started at least, and it reads like a scattered first draft. It has a small fraction of the comedy I'd like in it, and it seems like all the characters have seemingly the same voice. But I'm forging ahead, and I can fix the bulk of it later. Still can't decide if I want to adopt the traditonal third person narrative or adopt a journal like retelling of the story.

The last dubious first is Daisy's first day of dog training school, which I shall now refer to Embarassment school. While I didn't expect Daisy to be the perfect little princess, I didn't think we'd be stuck in the corner with a barrier draped with blankets. We had to bring the dog in the car a few tomes because she was barking and frantic so damn much that it was distracting the other dogs. She would spazzing while in class, whining and barking and lunging herself into the air trying to sniff all the other canine ass in class. She acted like a dog on crack cocaine and speed, and I couldn't look anyone in the eye. Yes, that's my dog trying to dominate or intimidate your dog. I dunno, I was embarassed and couldn't take too much of it. What a grueling experience.

Gonna get some uncharted on. I have some semblence of control over that.

Stagnant

2009-10-22T14:05:00.001-07:00

Quite possibly a false perception on my part, but it is rather disconcerting to see progress in your peers while your own life spins in the mud, burrowing deeper into stagnant muck. I take very slight comfort in my age, thinking that the lower thirties aren't quite a lost cause, but nevertheless a call for concern. Looking into my bag of tricks isn't encouraging, there's really nothing beyond the usual card tricks or a string of multi-colored hankerchieves that most employers have not already seen done or done better, so I'm basically starting off at ground zero. I'm not better than a recent high school grad, except there will be this cavervous gap that I'll have to account for whereby my career stalled in the wrong lane, seemingly oblivious to the other open available lanes next to me. I can't help but be frustrated and guilt-ridden at my desire for more. It isn't more money, or a glorified position, but rather finding my place in this world doing something that I'm gifted at. My great hope is that November is a month of obligation, that even a shoddy first draft will be enough to warm my blood to yearn for more inspiration. I have to write to stay afloat from drowning in my pool of utter despair.

Writing Style

2009-10-21T05:32:00.000-07:00

Been writing in a blogging conversational style now for so long I'm not entirely sure if I can write an actual story now, let alone a novel in one month. November isn't even here yet and I have tangible anxiety about the deadline, but I guess that's what National Novel Writing Month is all about. Self imposed pressure to put pen to paper. I had a couple ideas for outlines but really nothing concrete quite yet. I think the biggest obstacle right now is just starting. Deciding a tone, characters, and just trying to figure out which foot to start out with.

Short Fuse

2009-10-14T16:44:00.001-07:00

Ok, it's not like I'm about to blow the gasket anytime soon, but the pressure gauge is needling in the red. There seems to be a lot of tension in me, from both the busyness of being a family man, and the inertia of being a man stuck in a job that's going round on a short track. So like the many promises that I make and break on a weekly basis, I thought blogging might spark the brain a bit, to keep it from gathering moss or rusting away.

It seems like I'm being over protective, but when I hear about some of the shennigans going on at the kids school, I can't help but want to intervene. Protecting them from life is impossible, I know, but I'm still going to voice my opinion about how they expect to be treated by their peers. Logan is chasing after Zoe and throwing pine cones at her? I'm about ready to confront them at the busstop and inform his parents that the next thing that is going to be thrown will be Logan if he doesn't knock it off. Having grown up and being picked on as a kid, that shit doesn't go over well with me. Until the kids grow up and develop their own crazy coping mechanism, I'm going to interfere because it is my business. I guess I'm old school like that.

Comtemplating getting a bigger vehicle now, since Daisy has to go everywhere with us because she can't be left home alone - see exhibit A, chewed up photo frame. The kids are getting slightly cramped back there as well, because their short little stumps are sprouting. So yeah, it's not like we are thinking of upgrading because of a dog, it's something that we've been ignoring for quite some time. When grandma goes anywhere, she's packed in there like a sardine withou seatbelts, which really ain't cool. But sad reality is that we don't have much capital, so even if we can put some money down and trade in my beloved Honda, we will probably be tied down to a loan with some horrible interest. So that idea might just have to chill for a little bit.

The short weekend

2009-10-11T21:56:00.001-07:00

I look forward to my three day weekends because during my weekdays, the 40 hour workweek is compressed so tautly into my life that there's barely room enough for me to breathe. Friday had some overtime, so the week is shorter than usual and some bug is threatening to gain the upper hand over my body. Today is a little bit of a disaster, having to take Daisy to Bellingham because she's still too young to be home alone. She's going slightly bonkers, too many other animals to contend with. She's her own special brand of crazy right now.

Finished Season 2 of Californication and I have to give mad props, as the hipster palance goes, for being an enormously entertaining show. It features really good writing and it's got the kind of raunchy humor that makes my day, but is also quite smart. Season one is streaming on Netflix, and we just finished Season two on DVD.

2009-10-02T20:56:00.001-07:00

September was a big bank bust, after the birthdays, the iPod, the PC replacement, the dog adoption... We should be eating top ramen for the rest of the year. I was adding up Daisy's cost, and between the adoption fee, the vet, and the pet supplies, it's another huge expense. I guess it's a good thing she's not stinky or anything... Oh wait.

Since she was spayed a day before we picked her up, we're not supposed to give her a bath so that her stitches can heal properly. So now she smells so much like a dog that we are smelling like a dog house. Phew. So, more air freshners and open windows for us.

This week has been a challenge, with dog training taking up most of our free time. We can't really go on normal walkies yet because Daisy is so keen on chasing everything. Has been feeling more than land skiing than anything, our shoulders slightly out of place from all that yanking. That said, she had already learned to sit, shake, and lay down within a week. So that's pretty good if you ask me. Daisy has still got the cold, so she's hacking like a senior citizen who's been smoking all her life. It's a little disconcerting waking up to that sound, halfway expecting a pool of vileness to follow the horrid sound. But it hasn't happened yet, thankfully. She's also a rather poor bedmate, sticking limbs in our backs and occupying open spaces with her body, disabling our ability to toss or turn. This morning, after I took her potty at 6:30 am and failed to fall back asleep, she even decided to snuggle up with me by placing her head on my shoulder. It would be tremendously endearing had not her doggie breath occupying every breath I drew.

But if it hasn't been evidently obvious, we are smitten with this terrier. She has been...

Well, she just peed in the house. Better go reclaim our scent back. Grrr.

2009-10-02T20:17:00.000-07:00

We decided to head back to the Bellevue shelter regardless that we've been here the last two days and we looked at two different animals, Tina, a beagle mixed with terrier maybe, and Barney, a dashund. Tina has a good personality, very playful, and a tad big for the kids when she's on her hind legs. We were worried about that primarily, because the kids seemed to be frightened of her. Barney was more easy going, but she was a Dashund and I guess I had some kind of biased, in that a pet should never, by default, look ridiculous. No disportionate body parts for me, thank you very much.

---

I'm just gonna skip right ahead to the results, since I don't want to write as if it were just happening, since it has already been a day. We ended up getting "Tina", the terrier even though the kids preferred the Dashund. Tina actually scared the kids a little because on her hind legs, she posed a big licking threat. Ultimately it came down to this, we needed a dog that would outlive the current novelty of having a small dog. Right now a small dog is good, but when the kids are older, they would be stuck with a dog that can't run fast, jump much, and would be mortally wounded by a frisbee. We needed a dog that the adults would like because it's not a kids plaything, it's a family pet that the parents would be primarily responsible for. So we went for the terrier. Shortly after we left the shelter with her, it was already decided that her name would be Daisy. It didn't even take a few years, but later in the evening as the kids are running with the dog, I knew we had made the right choice.

Arf.

2009-09-25T18:48:00.001-07:00

Sitting on a bench wondering if Leah is going to be the right dog for us. There is another couple currently checking out the dog and I imagine they would probably adopt her. We had a early candidate but since she was a pitbull mix, her criteria didn't quite fit ours so she was disqualified based on her breed, pretty much. So if Leah isn't available, we might just stop by another shelter and seeing what happens.

--

Well, we met with Leah and she was a little big and a little too active for the kids. Alex was making excuses when he was clearly not comfortable when she was on him, licking his face off. Zoe did a lot worse, she was pawed and licked and she started crying. She was mostly just frightened because on her hind legs, the dog could take her down. We went to another shelter but they only had 4 dogs, no keepers there either. So we will just have to pass, might check back later in the week and see if we can find a suitable addition to the family.

Voluntary Layoff

2009-09-22T17:09:00.000-07:00

Don't worry, this has nothing to do with me personally, just that it's a term that's floating around work with the contractors. First things first, it does suck for them. I don't disagree with that whatsoever, because some of them have been contractors for well over a year, and it sucks that there's no horizon to look forward to. The company can't hire because they are not seeing their own horizon very clearly themselves. However, with that said, some of the attitudes that I've been encountering has been aggravating me quite a bit evidently, because I kind of blew up at work during break at my co-workers.

I won't get into too much of the details, but basically these employed individuals want to be laid off so that they could collect unemployment, and then go to school. For someone who has always worked and schooled at the same time, it rankles me to no end because they are capable, human beings who basically want to be paid to go to school, under the impression that they have no other choice, that they cannot be employed otherwise.

I have benefited from public aid myself, having to be on WIC as well as using grants to finish college, and I know that there are millions who are unemployed, because of the depressed economy and the lack of open positions. But when someone tells me that they want to be "laid off" so that they can collect unemployment? That really bothers the hell out of me.

So I brought up that I'm a taxpayer, that old argument that always seems more self-serving and self-righteous than anything, but here's the bigger reason why I have a big chip on my shoulder about it. Never mind that unemployment wages are paid by taxpayer money. What about personal responsibility? What the hell happened to pride in yourself? Before public aid was available, and you didn't work, you just got kicked out and became a bum. You just suffered and had to struggle. Now evidently, you just have to march down to the unemployment office and make some life adjustments and still "get paid." Seriously, MAN UP. If you've got a family to support, WORK. If there was no economy and we had to depend on hunting and survival skills, and if you didn't go out there to hunt, you and your family dies from starvation. Shouldn't that same urgency and will to survive carry over to this industrialized nation? When you collect unemployment or abuse the system, don't you think it tips the balance of those who are willing to contribute to the public good and those who cannot because they are truly unable to?

I'm just getting mighty pissed at people who abuse the system to take advantage of Unemployment and Disability pay. I would love to sit around and bitch about how life isn't fair, or love to get something for nothing, but goddamnit I have pride in myself. My children look up to me, and I have to be able to stand by my words and actions. Anyone can cheat the system, get something for nothing, but at the end of the day, after I've woken up at 4:30 in the morning, going to a job I'm overqualified and underpaid for, and hoping that something better does come my way, I can still say that I'm a good man. That I earned every penny honestly. That in the end, I contribute to my community, to my society. I did my job, and it feels good to have done it.

Now I'm going to get off my soapbox. That I paid for with my own hard earned money.

New

2009-09-19T22:00:00.001-07:00

There's been a lot of new things happening lately, I suppose that's just the evolution process in action, really. Just last week, I had a chance to show off some of my video editing skillz at work and it seems like even though I've been talking about my filmmaking degree, nothing really sinks in until they see some footage for a project we were working on all last week. Then it's like, wow, didn't know you could do that. Didn't know you had the talent. Anyway, not quite sure where any of this might go, but it's nice that I got some kudos for my project. It's one of these things that go under the radar for so long and then suddenly it seems like a brand new surprise.

Haven't spent a lot of time on the new PC, although I am using it right now to type this. Have been, in fact, spending most of my time playing with the iPod Touch, it is virtually a mobile Wifi device that continues to surprise and fascinate me. Usually I get something and there are degrees of excitement followed by a humble letdown, like the browser on the PSP, the game resolution on the DS, or the Nikon's level of difficulty. But the iPod Touch for the most part has delivered in its surprises and thrills. I've nothing but praise for this piece of metal and glass and a big fat brain. Interestingly, I've spend most of the time playing with the apps and discovering little things about it, and not really using it for its primary function much, which is to play music and podcasts. The week long project I was in didn't factor too much podcasting in, so I just had to play with it at home. But man, I'm just wowed by this gadget. I even took it out today, and while we were waiting for our food in the restaurant, I played Scrabble with my wife.

The PC has been doing pretty great, except I'm having a bit of trouble registering for my Windows 7, and so far I haven't had any real problems with it. I've gone a little open source with the Open Office and the Gimp, but other than that the PC hasn't had much installed in it. Welcome to the age of Google, I suppose. Everything can live in the cloud, and is likely safer up there.

Well, got dishes to tend to. Maybe more Spaced after this.

The Big Sigh

2009-09-13T08:58:00.001-07:00

Well, the big week has come and gone, I've gone through the whole career mode of Rock Band Beatles, and now have to wait for the rest of the DLC to make my experience feel complete. The iPod touch is in the mail, or should I say, shipping from China, and should be here by next Wednesday or so. But somehow I'm still feeling a little jilted in a way.

The touch has been broken down by other websites and it seems to have been designed for a camera in mind, there's even a spot reserved for a camera. But for whatever reason they just left the damn thing out. But I got one before the blogs and websites started their chatter, and since there's no ETA on the camera equipped Touches, I just got one anyway.

My honeymoon with Apple got worse when my Mac Mini flipped me the proverbial bird and now is lagging like a mofo in molasses. It even failed to boot last night so I'm looking to the dark side today, shopping for PCs. The Mac mini has lasted me 3 plus years but the idea of putting a new hard drive into a machine that isn't even fast enough to run hulu or youtube seems ass backwards. So I'll have to check to see what's available for me.

The kids have accustomed themselves to school rather easily, and having them share their adventures and lessons from school makes me smile. They seem to be getting along just fine at school, and doesn't seem like being in the same class is a problem for them. They play separately if they want to, stick together if they need to.

Self-Eval, apparently.

2009-08-22T14:36:00.000-07:00

Had a relatively short week since I took Monday off for Zoe's birthday, but it still felt like a long week regardless. Work was slow and there were a lot of moments whereby I thought about an alternative career, like garbage collection. At least they have the satisfaction of staying busy.

Was listening to Stephen Fry's podcast about language and how it doesn't really matter what form of language you communicate with and how good your grammar is (mine infamously isn't) but the idea is just to use whatever language you're capable and accustomed to and just express yourself in whatever form you choose, which inspired me since I often discount myself as a mediocre writer, and a barely capable screenwriter. Even my blog entries are passably entertaining, otherwise nobody would bother with it at all. I remember a neutral party describing the blog as "simple, but effective." I should maybe write brochures or pamphlets.

Am really trying to be a good boy and not spent every paycheck I get on games, and it sure is tempting to do so especially when you can shop from home. Even at the store, they had "Saints Row 2" on sale and with all the discounts it would've been about 17 bucks, but I had to resist. September will soon be upon us and I will surrender a chunk of charge to both Harmonix and Apple, with their Beatles Rock Band and the Abbey Road DLC, and of course the 3rd gen iPod Touch. With Camera. That's the rumor anyway. And though it may not offer eternal happiness, it should suffice in giving me the illusion of fulfillment at least for a while.

I should probably address this emerging anti-social behavior that I'm developing. I don't really know why, but I've started weighing social interaction vs. personal enrichment, especially at work. I've been ignoring co-workers in favor of podcasts and portable gaming because I find that I gather more information and entertainment from the latter, and though my co-workers aren't boring per se, they're just less rewarding than the podcasts or the games. I know, it sounds like absolute snobbery and stuck-up butt face behavior, but there's such a premium for free time that I'm willing to face the stigma of being a stick in the mud. I guess it's no secret that often I find socializing to be a tedious affair, mostly because I know that most people find me utterly dull and difficult to talk to. I can be entertaining but robotic and impersonal in my conversation, lacking the attention or apathy to be involved in other people's lives. And often anything that comes out of my mouth is either a joke, a story about someone else, or strangely open and revealing, like an oral blog with no filters. That scares people, from what I understand.

Alex just punched Zoe in the gut to see how tough she was. Guess who's on a time-out?

Hiatus

2009-08-15T12:24:00.000-07:00

I know, it has been an obscenely long time since I've posted anything, and I think Facebook has spoiled me rotten. The short posts, the instant feedback, the audience... it becomes way more gratifying to stick a thought into Facebook than to compose drivel on the blog and have absolutely no dribble of interest from anyone. But I have remedied that little problem by tying my blog to my Facebook! Unabridged Nicky!

I'm coming to accept that Diego Mcnamara might as well be my second name, since there's virtually no anonminity to that name anyhow. And when my personal blog, my flickr account, my youtube account uses that name while my face and name is plastered all over, its moot to keep it any secret at all. Ignoring the advice of many tech journalists, my online life is pretty much an open book. I don't know, I don't think people really care enough about me to do anything about it. I guess I'm apathetic about my privacy like that.

Did a little bit or reorganizing to my desk area, and finally gutted out the area of junk that has been accumlating in the entertainment center that hasn't been very entertaining in a long time. It became junk central, just a storage dump where all my electronic crap went. A bookshelf now sits there and I still need to sort out the particulars in the contents, but otherwise it looks a load better.

I continue into my musical awakening not by learning an actual instrument or diving into music history, but by buying Singstar for the PS3. We have been captivated by ABBA's collection of 70s pop and boy, they have some of the funnest songs to sing, even if I'm not completely sure what I'm singing about. My singing voice is a cross between a nasal croak and a 60 year old smoker with retracted genitals, but at least my pitch is pretty good. Good enough to fool the game that I can carry a tune! I see it as good practice for Beatles Rock Band, because I can tell you now I'm going to sing the feces out of that game for sure, probably while playing the guitar as well. I love me some Beatles.

Thinking about "Spaced", a 2 season comedy from the early 00s that had Simon Pegg and Nick Frost in roles, as well as Edgar Wright directing episodes. That's right, the guys that made "Shaun of the Dead" and "Hot Fuzz". It's now streaming on Hulu, and I highly recommend it to anyone who is into absurdist comedy like I am.

Well, we will see if this links to Facebook. I guess I do miss being droningly boring in long form after all.

2009-07-09T20:49:00.001-07:00

I'm generally not one to listen to my own advice - my famous last words would probably be, "I thought it was the other pit that was filled with spikes and acid," or "told you that musket was loaded." So it served as no surprise that after I had warned my co-workers to never tell his spouse whether he would work overtime or not until he left the building, I broke the same rule and emailed my wife that I was, indeed, off work tomorrow. They mentioned we weren't needed, and there was no work. So I told my wife, no work. Within 20 minutes, while I'm still on lunch, my lead asks me to go to the warehouse in Bothell, and to do work there tomorrow as needed. Now this wasn't so much a punishment than a compliment, so I said, sure. I needed to pad my measley 32 hour week anyway.

I carpooled with Sergey, an Armenian guy that I work with quite frequently. He's a nice enough guy, although sometimes he's quick to frustration because of misunderstandings. But an okay guy. We drove in his car and although it was a short drive, we did get lost and I was about to hurl by the time we got there because I was getting carsick. It was right after lunch and Sergey kept turning around, making quick jolts with his wheel, and I was a shade of green by the time we got there.

While there, we just looked at some numbers over and over again, checking lot codes and making notations. Nothing exciting really.

But when it came time to go home, we got lost again, I don't really know how, and I was always late getting home for the changing of the guard with the kids.

So there you go. Lesson of the day, never ignore your own advice, and never be a passenger in a car. And stay away from pits reeking of acid.

2009-07-05T11:40:00.001-07:00

After today's Fourth, I could apply to be the entertainment director of a cruise liner. This is the only slow moment of the day, just us sitting on a bench outside the mall watching the park traffic empty out slowly. The streets are still clogged, with cars trickling out of the mall.

We started out relatively early, left the house at around 3 and came for the mall. We took care of purchasing movie tickets first, then walked over to the California Pizza Kitchen, had a Thai Chicken and a Garlic Chicken pizza, then headed down to the park where the kids found some inflatable goodness to enjoy. After gawking at some juggling fools and getting some weird swag, we went to see Star Trek.

The movie was pretty good, and I was actually a little miffed at a few of the comments heard on Filmspotting, about how they thought the story was servicable and that the villian was a throwaway. I thought the story not only bridged the old and new fans relatively well, but also managed to pay tribute to the old Trek while ushering in the new. How all the crew members get promoted into their roles seemed a little goofy, with a lot of off-screen folks buying it, but overall it was a fun ride.

Right after the movie we hustled down to the park, even though we probably didn't have to. We found a spot and gambled on it, and worked out perfectly. People were extremely pushy and inconsiderate but we enjoyed ourselves. We waited for the traffic for about an hour before heading out.

Madeline

2009-06-29T07:47:00.001-07:00

There was a kid at the playground playing with Zoe earlier, by the name of Madeline or Madison or Maddening... something to that effect. At first she seemed like a nice girl, older than Zoe or Alex but somehow patient enough to play with Zoe. Before things got weird.

At first, it was just Madeline hanging upside down on some bars, and my wife was being polite, saying that was pretty cool. Then she got talkative on us, telling us that she went to school at a circus, and then she could do a lot of tricks and magic. Which was fine for a while. I was blogging on the phone and watching the kids when I realized that after she finished an act or made a statement, she would look at us for confirmation and acknowledgment. We would smile politely and then focus on our kids, but Madeline was persistent. Like a kid vying for attention.

She disappeared for a while with her mom, and while I was pushing Zoe on the swing she reappeared. Zoe was done and wanted off, so Madeline climbed on and as Zoe and I walked away, she looked at us and yelled, "Push me!" I ignored her, telling Zoe that her mommy needed to push her, and grown ups don't handle other peoples children. When we went to the fountain, Madeline demanded at the top of her voice to know where we were going.

Although we got a hitch-type attachment for Alex, whereby its like a tandem type deal that he could ride behind me, Zoe is still in a bucket seat that attaches directly on the bike. Zoe is petite enough to fit in the seat, but ever since we got Elaine her fancy new bike, Zoe has less room than before, with the bucket seat closer to the rider's seat.

When it came time to leave, we set off on the bike and Madeline saw us.

"Are you leaving?"
"Bye!" says Alex.
"ARE YOU LEAVING?!"
"Yes! Bye!"

As we rode away, she must have noticed the proximity between my wife's behind and Zoe, because she offered this nugget as we rode away.

"YOU'RE SITTING ON HER!"

2009-06-28T16:42:00.002-07:00

It's been a rather disturbing weekend, with 50 something year old celebrities dropping off the face of the earth. Kinda makes one think about their mortality, and if I punch the ticket at 50, would I have much of a legacy to leave behind? Well, that's a rather disturbing thought, on to something else.

Alex is a bit of a gentle giant. A couple weeks ago Alex was walking up to us to tell us something when a smaller kid who was running ran into him and bounced right off him. Alex just glanced at him, slight annoyed, then continued talking to us. Kids at the playground can pick on him or lean on his comfort zone and all he ever does is take it with a nervous smile. We have to intervene often, telling him to express himself instead of being mowed over.

The hardest part of being a parent for me is trying to preserve the children's innocence as long as I can. I do this to a certain extent, I do warn them of strangers and things that endanger them, I'm mostly worried about the other stuff, like their emotional well being. How children decide their heirarchy amongst themselves, and how it seems so unfair at times. Its probably the natural order of things but it doesn't mean I'm comfortable with it.

Feeling rather lazy today, either I'm suffering from the allergies or its just a Sunday thing to do. Don't feel like doing much of anything right now, save relaxing and thinking about not much. Have this overwhelming urge to snack, but I really shouldn't.

Randomness

2009-06-28T16:42:00.001-07:00

So here are some rather random paragraphs that I was drafting for my "memoir", before I decided that my life after all, was decidely rather dull and uneventful. Interesting I suppose, to some people but largely stinking of being normal. So here it is, free of charge, on the blog. I better get working on my fictional story then.

-----
A co-worker who was breaking down boxes saw me passing by, and stopped me. "I have some feedback for you," she offered. As I placed my hand on my holster, she went on and expressed that the popular opinion, from what she gathered at least, was that I was a nice guy. I was always helpful, very considerate, genial. I thanked her, and as she walked away wondered what her name was.

I have a rather adaptive type of personality, which partially explains what I'm a Jack of most trades, Master of none whatsoever. Shifting the blame to that traumatic move to America, I realized quickly that it was either adapt and become communicable with the people around me, or jump off a bridge, which is considerably tougher since I didn't have a car to drive to a bridge and was too lazy to figure out bus routes. My accent was an awkward British-based, Chinese accented mish-mash that folks in my country dubbed Singlish, which stood for Singapore English. At best, the language sounded like a well-educated businessperson from China. At its worst, Singlish was nearly unbearable, with its Hokkien and Cantonese roots inflecting through the broken English to create a sing-songy, stringy tone that warranted the back of the someone's hand to whoever was emitting that sound.

It took a lot of over-the-air tv reruns of Bewitched, Hazel, and I Love Lucy episodes after school to soften my accent, although now that I think about it, I probably sounded a little old-timey to my school mates, saying things like, "Gosh" and "Fiddlesticks." Ridding the accent also required quite a bit of listening to what I needed to emulate, the language that circulated at lockers, classrooms, and the local Jack in the Box.

The accent got better through time, and even though my family members still have that discernable accent of a Singaporean TV reporter, I've morphed my accent well enough to fool friends who are unaware of my country of origin. When I was still doing weddings, I often wondered when they booked me if they thought a peppy blonde girl might be doing their videography, but instead this Chinese guy shows up.

2009-06-21T12:52:00.000-07:00

Not entirely sure why I'm still blogging, seems like everyone I knew who blogged just stopped, either out of boredom, out of time, or just gave up due to a lack of audience. For me, Facebook has replaced it slightly, but of course that's not really a forum to air out everything. In a way, Facebook is a great social tool for keeping in touch, but also a soapbox for trivial information about people. Everything you never cared to know about someone, now on Facebook!

Finished reading "Manhunt", which chronicles the manhunt for John Wilkes Booth after the assassination for Lincoln, and it was just a fascinating read. This isn't some stodgy retelling or a fictionalization, but rather a painstaking account gathered from thousands of sources before that paints a detailed procedural of the 12 day pursuit. It is actually quite amazing really, that Lincoln was so easily accessible, that Booth was so ill prepared after his deed, and how his leap onto the stage ultimately played such a hugh part of his demise. And I also didn't know that assassinations were also in play the same day for the Vice president and a semi-failed one for Seward. It was just a really good read, and I hadn't read a book since Alex was born. Next book on the list is "When you are engulfed in flames" by David Sedaris. Yup, after all my gadgets I'm going to the paperback. What a weird turn of events. Perhaps the best thing about this reading business is that its inspired me to think about writing again. Certainly not at the level I've been reading but anywhere is a start for me. Maybe I can self publish and get enough people to take pity on me and purchase a few copies.

2009-06-07T16:06:00.001-07:00

It can be slightly confusing when there's 2 versions of the same movie out, especially when one is in 3D and the other isn't. We had to move things around because the 3D version of "Up" had already started, and we showed up for the 2D version. Despite that's it was actually 4 bucks cheaper, our screening is now at 1:50.

This weekend turned out a lot cooler than expected, since earlier in the week it had been record setting heatwave freaking us Northwesters out. Which I suppose is a good thing because that temperture, while it was nice, was a little crippling. So I spent most of the weekend being a uber geek, watching Ghostbusters on Roku, finishing up Resident Evil 5, a superb game with great cinematic moments, and doing the super geeky act of hooking up my Roku player to my Location Free unit. In laymen's speak? I can now what instant streaming Netflix movies on my computer (which was too slow to stream) and my PSP. Netflix on my PSP, dude.

Now with Facebook, I've had more interactivity with people and more audience with that so I don't blog as much. Facebook forces me to use brevity so I don't go on these long rambling tech babbles, but the ability to write about crap I like is still nice. The primary audience in all of this is still pretty restricted to me and my family. Although reading "Manhunt" got me thinking. People in the past wrote in great prose, choosing words rather carefully, and here I am, writing in disregard of grammar or spelling. I really should word my blogs with a little more care. It would certainly form better writing habits.

I was letting the children jump all over me yesterday on the bed and I think they sprained something of mine. Alex has gotten so big that I forgot he's something of a grown boy. When he jumps on me, he does cause some measurable damage to my weak physique. Now my shoulder feels out of wack and my neck feels like I've been in a badly executed chokehold.

Well, gotta go eat some Pho and see "Up".

Vacation Continued

2009-05-29T19:09:00.001-07:00

We've returned from Packwood but that doesn't mean that the vacation has ended. After reluctantly putting all our crap away, doing some grocery shopping and putting that stuff away, we retreated to the back patio, put a couple lawn chairs up, and let the kids be one with nature playing with their golf set and water pistols, while I read a little, watched some video podcasts, and tap away on the sidekick.

Its been really relaxing, other than the fact that the children have destroyed half their toys due to rough play and general chaos. But they're having fun, even if they are out a golf set.

Was at Freddys and saw inFamous on the shelf and was deathly tempted to get it, but I'll have to wait and pretend to save a little in order to purchase that. Played the demo and its a pretty amazing game, and I wouldn't mind supporting that game because is a pretty neat original IP, is exclusive for the PS3, and above all, fun as hell. There is nothing more fun than doing some free running/parkour in an urban setting, then using your electrical powers to blow stuff up.

Also downloaded the Rock Band Unplugged demo and that's a no-brainer. It has got a slightly different gameplay and while the single instrument warmup would've been fun, the track switching aspect of the gameplay makes it a true Harmonix game, one that's fun to play, tough to master. I look forward to rocking out on June 9, and I'm not even paid to say that.

Got 3 more days of this, and thankfully so does my wife, because even though she's been off since last Thursday, there really hasn't been much time spent together because we were constantly surrounded by people.

Should contemplate dinner shortly. Something about a balanced diet that sustains my childrens' health? Hmmm.

Packwood

2009-05-28T17:37:00.001-07:00

Sunday

"Camping" has officially begun, and we are at a visitors center somewhere in the pass. I don't really even know what pass this is, but we are probably halfway to Packwood. There's no reception whatsoever. We stopped for the restroom and we're off again...

---

Here at the shed, at around 2pm, so it was pretty good time. We didn't even get lost, which is fairly rare for me. The lot is a little overgrown, but not too bad.

---

So I guess twice a year, Packwood has a flea market event whereby the food vendors and antique dealers come out and peddle their overpriced food. We spent 10 bucks for 2 corndogs and 7.50 for 3 sno-cones, one of which was actually a replacement for Zoe because gravity had claimed hers. Afterward, Alex looked like he had feasted on Smurfs, with his blue face and lips and streaks of blue running down his arm. We walked about a little and looked at all the stuff before returning to Carla's. We'll be here for the night and be helping out tomorrow at the lot and the yard.

Monday

We decided maybe to skip the hotel and just stay at Carla's so that we can save on some costs. Besides, Carla has a microwave and a fridge so that's a major plus. Not quite sure what we have planned for today but it might be a leisurely day. Tomorrow we will be cleaning out the RV shed and maybe doing some yard work.

Been trying to do a little bit of reading, maybe some writing , or maybe catch up on some podcasts but I'm trying awfully hard to be socialable as well. I'm not the chatty type, I'm usually secretly hoping that nobody sits by me at work so that I could be by myself. But I suppose a small part of me is grateful that people don't mind sitting with me, so I just surrender to my social responsibility.

The sun has cleared the morning fog and now Mt. Rainier is framed brightly with the morning sun and the forestry around it, and the morning air is brisk, a little cooler than what's comfortable, but I'm sure it'll be a nice day today.

Well, maybe i'll go snap some photos.

---

After a detour of two due to roads being closed, we ended up picnicking at a mound near a scenic stop, which was alright. We also spent a little bit of time hanging out at La Wis Wis, this little spot where the glacier runoff streams past you. So we hung out there for a while before heading back to the lot.

Later in the afternoon, the kids and wife went swimming while I took some video and watched Garnette intermittedly. I was the killjoy that didn't want to swim but it was nice to get some videos of the kids in the kiddie pool and being so proud to be in the big people pool with floats. They just had the best grins on so it was worth it.

After a steak dinner we sat about the campfire for a little bit before I took the kids back to the house. The kids fell asleep to Hello Kitty cartoons and Jael and I had a really nice talk, probably the longest talk we've had ever. She's grown so much since she's left and it was nice to see that chatty side to her, and really seeing her adoration and love of Garnette come through her words. She really wants the best for her daughter and it really shows. So we talked for about an hour and a half, then Elaine joined in for another half hour or so before we got tired. I really did enjoy talking to Jael though, because she really opened up and it was nice to hear about the going ons in her life.

---

Tuesday

Today was project day, and I pretty much accomplished what I wanted to today. I admit to not being the handy type whatsoever, I'm a bigger nerd than anything, and I have a relatively low tolerance for mechanical obstacles. Fortunately, the project today was clearing out some of the junk in and around the RV shed, so I can do hard labor just fine. We cleared out odd things like spare parts, rotten wood, even an electrical meter out of the back and made a big pile for the dumpster. The project took less time than I anticipated, and was a lot easier as well. After that we just chilled for a bit, before we split up and some went swimming, while Carla, Rocky and myself went driving balls at the range. Seeing how the last time I went I was four years ago, I did ok. Nothing impressive, just happy with getting some straight shots into the 100 yard territory was good enough for me.

After that, I went back to the house and had some quiet time, watching podcasts and dozing off on the couch with the warm afternoon sun. It was kinda nice, Carla read her book and I just watched watched silly little vids about games and such. It was just a nice break.

So now I'm just waiting for pizzas, and then back to the RV lot.

---

Wednesday

We headed down by the river to play around, take some photos and just enjoy the time. Back at the house, sandwiches were had and then Rocky and Ramona were on their way, and the rest of us went down to the driving range again. Then I finally pinpointed where my aches were coming from, it was actually from swinging those clubs, and not bad food like I had speculated. After that it was more swimming, where I got some good photos and videos of the kids splashing about. I returned to cook some burgers and we just spent the rest of the evening chillaxing.

---

Thursday

After cramming all that junk back in the trunk, we headed back to reality. Strangely enough, all night I didn't sleep very well because I kept having stressful dreams. About overspending and not being able to access my bank accounts to balance it. Having things due but they weren't ready... all sorts of stress related shenanigans. And indeed some of it was rather prothetic, I did end up bouncing a couple transactions because I had forgotten to check the accounts when I left.

Since I've gotten home I haven't been able to relax. Oh well, it was nice while it lasted.

5/11 post

2009-05-10T17:12:00.001-07:00

I am either getting less sensitive and forgetting all the major holidays, or I'm just majorly lame. Anyway, Mother's day kinda crept up on me and here I am, sitting in a diner I'm reluctant to sit in, but the kids are late for dinner and at least they seem to be having fun decorating their fold-up plane with stickers while I'm sitting here mentally balancing my checkbook.

This afternoon we did break out the bikes and went to Marymoor, which was kinda a nice day for it. I used the trailer bike for Alex, which all in all wasn't too terrible, except there were a couple times when the balance in the back was so off that I almost dropped him. There's likely something still not quite right about my assembly, because sometimes when I take a sharp turn, the trailer grabs my bike seat and twists it off to the side, and suddenly I'm facing at a 45 degree angle while riding forward.

Took my Flip UltraHD to the park and captured some video, and although there is still an obsence amount of camera shake, the color quality is really quite good. It has a good color separation and the colors are rich and vibrant, and even the subtle colors show up as they should. Nothing is too washed out, or the camera doesn't focus on giving one color too much attention and undersaturating the others. It performs really quite impressively.

These past few days I've been feeling a little under the weather, just feeling like someone performed surgery on me and left like a cell phone inside of me. My body temperture is completely out of wack, my body is often too cold and my head is burning up. I've also been afflicted with some major dull headache, also with a little fatigue. But you know, nothing weird coming out of me so I'm assuming that its just allergies and fatigue.

___

Thunks in my head

2009-05-05T11:45:00.000-07:00

Truth can be such a relative concept that I often have to accept the notion that there has to be several versions of the truth that makes up a whole story. Yesterday I was challenged to add to a story with preexisting facts and they contradicted in a semi-grand scale. I spend some time wondering if indeed some lies or rumor might've made its way to my ears but I think that ultimately, they're probably all a little true. Sorry I can't be more specific, but I never really know who my audience is, but I'll say this much. It is about a relationship.

Getting the general feeling that I should be spending more time reading and writing. I'm by no means a very good director, just a capable one. I'm a good editor - whenever I get around to it. Editing to me is something sacred, in that the conditions have to be perfect whenever I start it, but easy when I get to it. Its rewarding when its all done, but I dread the road to completion. Writing I'm not that hot at, my vocabulary isn't that verbose, and I've been told that my grammar sucks donkey anatomy. But my storytelling skills is somewhat intact, even if it is subconsciously tainted by the many plotlines that I've already seen. I don't know, maybe i'll take a stab at writing some short stories. Perfect for someone with my attention span.

The One Where I Feel Old

2009-05-03T22:22:00.001-07:00

This post is going to make me sound old, and I suppose that's the reality of it. So on Friday I decided to get a new camcorder, and yes, that sort of makes my camcorder count to about 4, but I decided that that cheap Aiptek camcorder was too much of a weakling to handle any of my life's memories. There was terrible lag so the audio was never synched. So I was looking online and saw that Flip, which was something I was looking at when I looked at the Aiptek, had just released a new HD version going for 200 clams. And so after much thought, I went and got it at Best Buy on Friday.

So here's the old person part - I have a Sony VX2000 which is a high-quality, feature rich camera that I shot weddings and films with. It did break a little more when I did my film festival thingy, but I was just thinking about how I was just missing out a lot of life stuff because it's really awkward to lug around that monster to anything. So I opted to get a camera that was compact, and easy to use. Seriously, just two buttons and you're recording. There are only three options - set date and time, tone or no tone, and light or no light when recording. That's it. There's a laughable 2x digital zoom, but other than that, it's completely featureless. But I love it. Even though both my computers are too slow to play a 720p mp4, I still love it. My PS3 can handle it and I'm thinking forward. So yeah, I'm old because I opted for light and easy instead of heavy but high quality.

The second thing that made me feel old is one of my old co-workers in Bellingham, her daughter got married today and I don't quite know if it's because she's marrying young in my mind or that I'm just too damn old, but I remember filming her sister's wedding years ago. Like 5 years or something. She was like 14 at the time and now she got married. So that made me feel ancient.

The last one made me just sad.

I have the one that's in the back middle, the hamburger that turns into a robot. Alex plays with it now, for some reason he's attached to it quite a bit. So I was telling him that that's not like a toy I had, that is actually a toy that I have that he's playing with. It was from my childhood, came over to America with me. I was trying to frame it so I looked at the bottom of the toy and it said 1987. The commerical says 89, but there you have it. The toy is 22 years old. I have a toy that's older than the girl in the previous story.

Well, with that, I better go to bed. Us old people need our rest.

2009-05-01T16:52:00.001-07:00

Perhaps doing a time sensitive film project at the end of two weeks of overtime laden work was not such a good idea after all.

So after months of anticipation, I walk away from this experience slightly crushed, because I didn't really pull it off, at least not to my standards. The film was not complete when I drove it to a destination I didn't know how to get to, and when I saw the signs on the freeway that delays should be expected and I had 15 minutes to go, I just turned around knowing that it would be a disservice to everyone to submit the incomplete film. So I had the heady task of telling everyone that we didn't make it. And now I'll be spending some time reediting it as well as punching it up with some bloopers and such before posting it online and sending DVDs to folks.

Seriously, in that time frame I was up for almost 40 hours straight with only about 4 hours of sleep. I had to work in the morning at 5:30, went to bed after finishing the script at 1am, then woke up at 5am again to pack and move out. Didn't get back to bed till about 10 something at night. Needless to say, I was fatigued and mentally exhausted.

But I did meet some nice folks, most of which may not even want to work with me since I missed the deadline, but I'd like to work with them. So we will see. Dave asked me if it helped motivate me to begin doing creative things again, and the short answer is yes. Mostly to do something that improves on this one, which was restricted by time and theme.

This weekend it should be all edited and done, so hang tight...

A Story from my Wife from Last Week

2009-04-21T16:55:00.000-07:00

Alex lost his speck today
Where it went we cannot say
A piece of paper round and small
From his hand it did fall

Oh little speck where did you go
This little boy he loves you so
We have to find this little speck
If we don't I'll sure get heck

This day is ruined we cannot play
Cause Alex lost his speck today
Little boy will sit and fret
Because he's lost this little speck

This is a true story. He found a little piece of paper which he lost and he was really worried all the way home because the windows were opened and he didn't wan't the speck to get out.
Silly boy.

2009-04-19T22:01:00.001-07:00

One thing that's good/bad about Twitter and Facebook is that I do a lot of microblogging, so the guilt of not writing on the blog is slowly dispensed through my phone 147 characters at a time. So the need to blog is cut down quite a bit, which can be unfortunate for my wife, who's such a fan of my writing that often she shuns the real me to see if I wrote on my blog.

Anyway, been working entirely too much lately, since Monday it would've been 60 hours or so, which is really quite crazy since last week and next will likely be the same. It culminates in the 24 hour film festival on the last day, so we will see if fatigues claims my brain and my story idea would just be, "Yodeling in tights" or something completely unoriginal.

Not sure if its the work or not, but the kids seem to be on some hidden agenda to drive my wife and I to the brink of sanity. Alex got upped his obsessiveness to 11, and Zoe's got more attitude and sass than her tiny self can contain sometimes. The kids bicker back and forth and the soundwaves that emit from that is actually turning my hair gray. I'm actually sporting a balding pate on my head but a well placed rug conceals my shameful hair loss.

My Rock Band Obsession keeps growing, even though the news trickles slowly and some of it isn't even really news. For instance, Paul McCartney performed at Coachella recently and he's got possible RB Beatles footage behind him, and it looks cool. Also, the other thing I found out today was a "Jukebox" mode in RB, which is basically letting the game perform the song with the in game characters without actually playing the instruments. Basically, a music video jukebox. A lot of the songs on the game is music I'd listen to anyhow, so that's a really good feature to mess around with.

Today I just realized Eeeny Meeny Miny Mo is a complete setup. It's an illusion of choice. What a disconcerting revelation to my childhood.

Anyway, gotta chill now. Have to go back to work tomorrow. Sigh.

Best Day Ever

2009-04-04T23:53:00.000-07:00

Couples Who Drum Together, Stay Together

2009-04-03T23:37:00.001-07:00

Life in 3D

2009-04-03T17:22:00.000-07:00

Alex just asked me why I was in 3D.

So we went to "Monsters Vs. Aliens" and we had a pretty interesting experience. Alex's history with 3D pictures hasn't been great, since the last venture involved IMAX and dinosaurs, it ended up with him at the back of the theater hiding behind walls. So there was a lot of coaxing this time round, showing him how it looked through the lens without putting the glasses on him, and also some candy to distract him. After every trailer, he would take his glasses off, thinking that the movie would start and would scare him, but in the end he just left the glasses on because the movie wasn't scary at all. It was fun but man, it was fourty plus bucks even though it was a matinee.

Last week I was simply close to death from fatigue because I had two 50 hour work weeks back to back, and then a busy weekend of Bellingham and anniversary, so I took Thursday off of work, since there wasn't anything to do at work anyway. So now my schedule feels completely off because I have 4 days off and I only really needed some extra sleep is all. Today feels like Saturday even though it's only Friday.

But for our anniversary, we went to the Gold Class Cinema in Redmond and got a little pampered, which is another word for awkward, really. It was a traditional multiplex that was converted to a poshy movie-going experience. So you pay 32 bucks or so per person for a ticket, and you get to reserve your seating and order some dinner. When you go into the theater, you sit in the lounge area and have some drinks, all of which gets charged to your tab. Elaine had a Bud Light and I just sucked on a Diet Coke and popcorn. As the movie times got closer, we got nervous a bit due to old habits, but our waiter escorted us into the theater. There were big comfy recliners in the theater, four seats in the middle, 2 on each side, and about 6 or 8 rows I suppose. The recliners had push button reclining action, and compartments for stowing away your coke stash or whatever you brought with you. There was also a call button for waiters and such, and blankets could be requested if needed. The movie "Duplicity" was not a bad movie, but perhaps not particularly noteworthy either. It's a nice treat for sure, once you resign that you're going to spend about 70 bucks for a movie experience for two, and kinda be aware of what you're going to order and not go bananas over the menu. Definitely don't order that 300 dollar bottle of wine for your first date.

Yesterday I decided to get a second drum set for Rock Band. I'm still trying to get a good setup so that I could hook it up through Garageband and have me a fake drum set, but there are some latency issues and lag that makes it a little ineffective for actual practice. But we played drums together today and I gotta say, nothing cooler than playing with your wife in unison. Talk about playing together.

Happy Anniversary and Etc

2009-03-29T11:56:00.000-07:00

Happy Anniversary to my wife first of all, to whom I've been married to for six years now, but have probably loved my whole life. Just didn't know her before that. She's my best friend, the better half of me who fills up all the deficiencies I have and patches all my insecurities with her love and trust. She truly loves me in all my core whether we be living in a mansion with exotic pets and nude sculpted man servants or in a tiny little bungalow with a magazine and half a couch. I'm happy that she's my one and only and like I told her in the car, it's really like I was supposed to marry her because it just would not make any logical sense for me not to.

We don't have much planned for today because we were out yesterday at Bellingham and I worked a super full week, 50 hours of joyous awesomeness, but we are going to a fancy movie. That is, a regular movie in a fancy theater, where there are only a group of twin seats, with dinner and probably nude sculpted man servants as waiters, serving up exotic pets. Who knows. But we'll be spending some time together and having some couple time, since my mom's kind enough to watch them kids. It should be fun.

Yesterday was a good day as well, because we got to go up to Bellingham and my wife got to see her girls pretty much the whole day, the kids got to play with each other, and I got to play Rock Band. We didn't get home till 1am, which was a bit of a treacherous journey, since on the way back it actually snowed hard between Bellingham and Burlington, somewhere in there. The freeway was whited out almost, and it was like driving in warp speed with all the hard snow flying at us. We were actually chugging at 40mph and slipping a little. Insane.

Between the awesome Chinese food, the mind numbing RB, the really good Papa Murphy's pizza, perhaps a rather dubious history making tidbit is to be entered into my autobiography. Jake had purchased a moped and he was silly enough to trust me on it, so I took my first moped ride yesterday. Went up and down and street and completely fogged up the helmet with my nervous pants, but it was fun. Wouldn't get one for myself anytime soon though, I got really cold just from going at a leisurely speed.

Well, better get to the anniversary plans.

2009-03-25T18:21:00.001-07:00

This will be my positive post, since I bitch about everything all the time and struggle on a daily basis not to be bummed about something or another.

So I am hyped about Dansen visiting from Japan and dropping by to see me, possibly even to help with my 24 hour film project. And we definitely will have to do one podcast together, at least one, at the same location, which is just wild. We were talking about it after the podcast and its crazy because dude's never even seen my kids in person, only through photos and the miracle of skype. I've known dansen for 9-10 years now and I think through the podcast, I've come to appreciate him a lot more than I had when we were both in college. He used to be the crazy wacky friend with hordes of friends but now I realize he's just a passionate, canny, curious, intelligent and stubbornly fair (if not slightly warped) person who really has a pretty big ticker. If anything, the podcast really laid us out to each other. Its funny though, I think Pizza Bento is less entertainment than confessional, since we really just talk about ourselves for an hour and just not worry about content or such frivolity. But yeah, totally psyched about him visiting for sure.